Category: Life

  • ODDS and ENDS: Autumn Traditions, Fantasy Football, and Facebook Knew

    “Odds and Ends” is my continuing series of random thoughts and follow ups…

    It’s Autumn, and not fake “I Want It to Be Autumn So I Put on A Sweater But It’s 80 Degrees Outside” Autumn. It is in the 60’s and leaves are starting to change. Which means in our home, we’re going apple picking soon! This is the cheesiest tradition we have in our house. I mean, I do love it, but it is cheesy. We drive way the hell upstate to find some out of the way farm that isn’t too crowded, and go crazy picking and eating apples. The kid can only take about an hour of it, but for the first thirty minutes, we all behave as if we are some sort of apple expert, deciding how many of each variety we want. But I love it. And this year, I promise I won’t make the same old line about how we’re paying the farmer to his job. No more of that Dad Joke.

    Just for the record, I have a pretty good team in my fantasy football league. Now, I admit that I had nothing to do with my teams’ selection, as I let the computer auto draft my players. But man! I’m like Stephen A. Smith around here! I do know everything!

    Yup, Facebook knew. We all know this. Facebook knew what it was doing; how awful social media could be to democracy, and mental health, and all of it. But we all still use social media. Will the whistleblower who will talk on 60 Minutes on Sunday, and Congress on Tuesday, change people’s behavior? Sadly, I doubt it.

  • Your Level of Bullshit

    If you ask most people, they will tell you that they don’t put up with people’s bullshit, or that they have a “Bullshit Detector,” or my favorite which is that they are a bullshitter and one cannot bullshit them. These are all lies because people put up with bullshit all the time, especially from our friends and family. Probably because we love those people, and we just deal with their little lies.

    So let’s just call it what it is; we accept other people’s bullshit all the time. No one exists in the world who calls everyone out on everything. That person is not real.

    But we all do have a threshold. A line, once we get pushed over it, we start to fight back.

    I was told when I first moved to NYC that I would have a moment that I would yell, “Go Fuck Yourself,” to a person for either a minor or great indiscretion caused upon me. And that was true. I yelled at a guy in his car who almost ran me over in a crosswalk in Midtown.

    But today, I crossed a new threshold, and I thanked the pandemic for it. My tolerance for bullshit is lower, but I no longer feel the violent reaction to scream and yell at people.

    See, I was on an uptown local, coming back from grocery shopping. I had got on train at 96th heading to 125th, and there was a homeless person on the train, which is common and I don’t have an issue with that. But when the train started moving uptown, the person decided that this was a good time to start urinating from their seat.

    Yup, done here.

    I didn’t make a scene, just got off at the next stop and awaited for the next train.

    Now, you might say, of course you did that as that is a right normal thing to do. But I retort with that I was the only person who got off that half full car. Just me, everyone else put up with it. That was my line, and I guess it wasn’t the same for everybody else. I guess to them, that’s normal.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Tottenham Confusion, Unruly Passengers, and I Am That Guy

    Man, what is up with Tottenham? I mean, they just got by Wolverhampton in their League Cup match on penalties, and in total, they haven’t won a match since August 29th. With the North London derby this Sunday, it would be a good opportunity for the Spurs to show up. Arsenal isn’t playing well either, as they are sitting at 13th on the table, so you’d think that Tottenham would have the advantage, but, I’m not confidant in this squad. After a great start of the season, Spurs seem to have just floundered. The attack is lacking, and giving up two 0-3 blowouts to Premier teams doesn’t say much about the defense either. I mean, I’ll watch the match on Sunday, but I don’t see myself in positive supporter mindset for it.

    I know I can’t prove this, but I think one of the contributing factors in all the unruly passengers on airlines is the fact that the seating is too damn small, and people are too damn close! Just look up “The Incredible Shrinking Airline Seat” and see how many stories you can find. When people are too close, they get angry. Remember personal space?

    I am wearing a sweatshirt today. Is it that cold? Sort of. Am I doing it because I want it to be Autumn? Yes. It was 56 degrees this morning, so the A/C is off, the windows are open, and I am pretending that the season has really changed. I am that guy. But at least I’m cozy.

  • Too Hot in September

    It’s hot and humid in New York today, and it’s the end of September. That’s not normal. And it was like this last year. At the park yesterday, I was in shorts and getting bit by mosquitos. Again, that’s not normal.

    I say all of this as I have my air conditioner running in my apartment.

    When I moved to New York back in August of 2006, it was hot and humid; normal. I remember everyone telling me to just wait for September, and everything would be different. And usually around the 10th, the humidity went away, and the high was around 76, with the low being in the 60’s at night. You could leave your windows open all day, no a/c. It was warm in the sun, cool in the shade, and if you went out at night, you would take a light coat.

    I know I sound like a crazy old man, but it’s not like that anymore. This is the second year that we are still hot and humid at the end of September, with A/C’s running all day. NYC summers have always been awful; hot and humid, but it was a northeast hot, like 85 degrees, and maybe three days or so of 90’s. Now, we have several heat waves, three days in a row of more of 90 degrees, every summer.

    It is climate change. It’s here. This isn’t something that might happen one day in the future. We are in it now. And what I feel the worst about is that my kid has to deal with this. That she is getting this used up world. That she has to make it better, and that is too much to ask of any kid.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Traffic Tickets, IG is Harmful, and the Sadness of a Bald Man Getting a Haircut

    “Odds and Ends” is my continuing series of random thoughts and follow ups…

    It’s Friday, which is normally the day I that have to do the Alt Side Parking dance in the City. We had taken the car to get inspected at the start of the week, and the parking spot we found was Friday 9:30 to 11am. That time really didn’t work with my schedule, so this morning I went to go get the car and move it to a place where I knew I could get an 8:30 to 10am spot, which is much better for all the stuff I needed to get done today. Anyway, when I got to the car this morning, I had a ticket on the windshield for “Illegal Plastic Cover on License Plate.” That’s a thing? I say that because the car has been in the city for a long time. Long enough for us to get a couple of other parking tickets, all while that plastic cover was on the plate. So… why is it worth a ticket now?

    The one story this week that went by that I say got no traction was the leaked internal report from Facebook that Instagram is harmful, even toxic, to girls sense of worth and self-esteem, even though Facebook had been denying that for years. Wait?!?! Corporations lie? I will compare this story to the one about cigarette companies knowing that smoking was killing their consumers. It’s the same thing how alcohol companies know they need alcoholics to stay in business. Doing the right thing and making money really don’t go hand in hand. As someone who has a daughter, this only makes me want to keep her off of social media as long as possible.

    I need to get a haircut, I am a balding man, and this is an uncomfortable issue that comes up every three months or so. Not the way you think. I am balding, and I am okay with it. I knew it was coming since I was a little boy, as my father, and grandfather were bald, and also my grandfather on my mother’s side. So, there was no avoiding this. What makes getting a haircut uncomfortable is that I have half the amount of hair, and yet I am charged the same amount of money as if I had a full head of hair. I should at least be getting some sort of discount. The barber doesn’t have to work as hard on me, as my only options are short, or shorter, or no hair at all. I think 25% off would be fair, as I feel like I am subsidizing full headed men on their haircuts.