Category: Life

  • Let’s Talk About Debt

    We paid off a credit card today. It was a victory, but it barely made a blip on our daily routine. One reason is that mornings for us are a little crazy with walking a dog, and getting the kid ready, setting up remote school, and then setting up the wife’s remote work. Lots of moving parts. The other thing is that we just paid off one card of seven. So, we still have a long way to go.

    The reason for our debt is wide and varied, and will be the subject for a blog on another day.

    What I want to engage in is just talking about debt. Ever since I can remember, no one talked about their debt. Not my family, and not my friends. Maybe a joke about credit cards, or the ever-enveloping nature of student loans. Outside of an occasional joke, no one talked about the debt that was amassed.

    Debt has always been treated as a moral failure. That any debt is a sign you have failed in some way. That you are bad with money, or frivolous with planning, or just a person who can’t hack being an adult. Shame was placed on having debt.

    But as I have worked professionally, all companies have debt and use it to their advantage. Either in leveraging  it for lines of credit and loans, or using it as a loss for their taxes. Companies buy and sell each other and use the debt to load on the acquired company. I was sort of surprised at how corporations I worked for, had no intention of paying off their debt.

    I have decided that I will not be ashamed of my debt, and at the same time, I will still actively try to pay it off.

    But at the same time, I know if I pay all my debt off and no longer use my cards, then the banks will close the accounts, and then my credit will dry up. Now, if that happens, then I won’t be able to get the home/car/student loans I will need in the future. So, it’s like I have to keep some debt on the books.

    Funny how that works.

  • The Summer of Hiking 2021

    At the start of Summer 2020, as the pandemic was going strong, our family unit thought it was a good idea to take day trips on most Saturdays, and a few Sundays. The goal was simple, just get out of the City, and at that time the guidance was all good with going out to the woods and taking your mask off. Provided no one was around. This lead us to hike a few trails in New York, and Connecticut. We all enjoyed it and I even wrote about it last year.

    And we have been talking about doing it again. The Spring came, and we were still talking about it. I even got my AllTrails app up and running, and started looking for places we all could go, including the dog. But we just kept talking…

    Well, this weekend, we collectively got off our butts and did something about it!

    We went shopping!

    Down to the REI store at Broadway and Lafayette to get hiking boots and all-weather pants. Hell, throw in some socks while we’re at it. I had a feeling that the shoe salesman was upselling us when we were honest and said we were beginners, but I didn’t want to rock the boat, as everyone else was having a good time with trying the boots on.

    Now, it was a rainy mess up here in the Northeast over Memorial Day, but Monday was clear. We got in the car and headed out to the Old Mine Road Trail, which is rated moderate and good for kids and dogs. We had a good time and felt like we were being active as a family, which really is the point here.

    I also know myself well enough that if I spend money on an activity, I will follow through on it. Hence why I had to buy the boots; I got some skin in the game. Now, hiking is something that I have to do.

  • Running Again, Mask-Less

    So, I did it yesterday. I started running again. It has been over a year since I tried any form of exercise, and it felt like it. I ran around the local park in my neighborhood, and there was a noticeable jiggle to me, which caused me to get itchy in the jiggly parts. I wasn’t crazy, I knew that I needed to pace myself. I had a thirty-minute time limit, and I knew to jog, then walk, then jog, and then walk. I didn’t want to hurt myself on the first day, though I knew my legs would start aching soon enough. And that occurred last night about 3am.

    Chalk one more up to getting “back to normal.” I was out running without my mask. In fact, I didn’t even bring it. As I ran, pretty much everyone else was also mask-less. The parks are filling up with people around here, and I have to say that half of the non-exercising people are without masks. A few people who were jogging had a mask on, but on the whole, not many.

    I am trying to follow through on the things I have been promising that I would take care of after I got vaxed. Get around in the City on mass transit was one, and now, getting myself back in shape. The kid is very supportive in this effort. When I got back from running yesterday, she looked at me and said, “I think you lost weight.”

  • Summer is Coming

    For the first time, in a very long time, I’m actually getting excited for Summer. Usually, Summer in New York means loud window a/c’s, hot/sticky/smelly subway stations, sweating outside and then freezing when you step inside a store. Really, it’s just the oppressive and, honestly, offensive humidity, which blankets the City for two months and sometimes more, that really killed me.

    The heat of New York City was optimized for us, as we got married in 2011, outdoors, on the hottest day of that year, with a temp of 104. Don’t get me wrong, it was a great day, and I wouldn’t change it, as it was a day we will never forget, for multiple reasons. But after that day, my tolerance for heat just went down the toilet. I have been living a decade in dread when June approaches.

    Yet, this year, I’m looking forward to it. I know that this is due to being vaccinated, which is giving us the ability to go forth, mask-less in most situations. The idea of being outside in the heat sounds like freedom to me. The ability to travel, and see friends again; it’s like Christmas morning. I’m looking forward to a car trip. Driving to some faraway place, and getting out of the car and not worrying about being near people.

    Also, this will be the kid’s first real Summer vacation out of school. She might do a day camp, and we have an idea of a small vacation, but on the whole, she will be free to do nothing during the Summer. Splash parks and pools will be visited, and sleeping in late because it’s a Tuesday seem to be in order. It will be fun to live vicariously through her Summer experience, because out of everything that has happened in the school year, at least the Summer will be close to normal for her.

  • To Dare is to Do

    I have written about my current inability to finish reading a book. I start one, start the habit, then something happens, and I get out of the habit. This has everything to do with discipline, and my complete lack of it. Maybe I made the mistake in believing that the Pandemic would give me to opportunity to reset my life, and to create new, better habit, or at least correct things. But unemployment, remote school, and the feeling for the first two months of the pestilence that we were going to die… It made some easy things very difficult to accomplish.

    But the Pandemic is coming to an end and we will start living close to normal lives again. In that spirit, I am giving reading and finishing a book one more shot.

    I pulled down Donald Barthelme’s 60 Stories and started again. “Audere est Facere,” seems to be the idea here. I might fail again. And thus, try again, and sadly, fail again. I know what the right thing to do is, and I just need to keep trying. Everyone gets knocked down, not everyone gets back up.

    Now after having been very dramatic about reading, the other thing is that I do want my daughter to have the habit, the good habit, of reading, and I have to set the example. I have to show her that reading is important, that it’s enjoyable, that it’s the right thing to do. Really, there is my motivation. Just try again.