Tag: #family

  • Memories of Apple Picking

    When the wife and I were dating, we never went apple picking. Around here, it’s an easy “Cute Date” you can have. You know, rent a car, go upstate, dress in flannel and sweaters, take lots of pictures that involve hugging while holding apples. We used to make fun of people who did it.

    Then time passed, we had a kid, and my parents came to visit one year in the Autumn, and as we were trying to think of things to do with them, we went apple picking. And it was fun. Holding a plastic bag, pulling apples off a tree, walking around eating them, and talking. Talking with my Mom while she held her granddaughters’ hand.

    When my parents came to visit, none of us had any idea that we had limited time left. I mean, you never really know that. You never know that, that goodbye, might just be the last goodbye. My Mom wanted to come back in the Autumn again, to apple pick, to look at the foliage. It just didn’t work out that way.

    And so, when Fall rolled around, we headed out to the farm, to pick the apples, like all the other people from the City. This year, we brought the dog, which was a nice change up. We got out the plastic bags, I put on my flannel, and the wife wore a sweater. We picked apples, and tasted them, and talked. And I took pictures, so, you know, we can keep the memories alive.

  • Doing Laundry

    Monday is laundry day around here. The family laundry has been my chore since the kid was born. I used to get up… Well, the new born would get us up at 6am, and on Sundays, I would head out around that time, and walk the one block to the local laundromat. We had been going to that place for years, and all the people who worked there knew me, so it was a friendly place. (In fact, before the kid was born, we used to drop our laundry off and use their wash and fold service. But with a baby, we stopped using the service, and I started doing it all ourselves.) That was six and a half years ago when I started doing the laundry. The laundromat has gone through a renovation and a change in management, but now every Monday, I am there doing it.

    Recently, I started thinking about my chore of the laundry. It takes up two hour of my day, and sometime longer if I do or do not get help folding. It would be nice to have a washer and dryer in our apartment, or at least in the building, but even if that were true, it would still be a chore that I would have to do, and it would still take up time. But, the time really doesn’t bother me, as I am writing this while all the clothes are in the dryer.

    What I started thinking about is how I sort of feel fulfilled doing this chore. Like making dinner every night, I like that I provide a necessary service for my family. I don’t feel like I am being taken advantage of, or that this is a thankless job. I like that I am doing something that helps the family keep moving forward. I never thought I would get to the point in my life where I would enjoy doing laundry.

  • Vacationing in Maine

    Our family vacation last week was in Maine, and this was the second time that we have stayed up there. The first time was three years ago, and that was along the coast, south of Portland. This time around we stayed up north in Newry, not too far from the Sunday River Ski Resort. We were sort of counter programming our vacation, as most people want to be near the water in the summer, and we did get a better deal being near the mountains.

    I’m not sure when Maine showed up on our vacation radar. We had visited Vermont before, and loved it. The wife’s extended family is from Connecticut, so we have spent time there with them, as well as in New Hampshire. A few years ago, I almost got a job in Rhode Island, and we went up there to check it out, and did really fall in love with that state. (Funny how two Texans fell for the smallest state.) Yet, Maine never crossed our minds as a place to visit.

    Then three years ago, my parents were taking a full East Coast road tour in their RV, and as they came through New England, we rented a car and joined them. This was over Memorial Day and the start of June 2018, and where we all ended up going was Rhode Island, which we all had a good time at.

    But when we got up to our vacation place at Camp Ellis, Maine, just four blocks from the beach, the trip took on a different dynamic for all of us. At night, you would go to sleep listening to the sound of the waves coming in on the ocean. The kid played in the sand at the beach, I had martinis with my folks, and the house we stayed in had a lobster pot, crackers and picks, so the wife tried her hand steaming lobsters for us. It was a good time, and a great vacation.

    It was also the last time I got to spend time with my mother before she died. I know you can never recreate past experiences or memories, but it was fun being up there again – with the cool evenings, and beach days, and even going to the L.L. Bean store in Freeport.

  • Personal Review: “Foster” by Bryan Washington

    (The short story “Foster,” by Bryan Washington, was featured in the June 14th, 2021 issue of The New Yorker.)

    I am always amazed by writers who use so few words to explain something, like the setting, and instantly I know specifically where they’re talking about. It’s like a magician making a large object emerge from a very small space; how did they pack all of that in there? Bryan Washington did that with his short story “Foster.” Washington dropped the word, “Montrose” in the second section of the story, and half way through the first page, I knew I was in Houston; along with the urban sprawl, sticky humidity, and vibrations of that city. This writer has skills in his word use.  

    “Foster” is a story about two estranged brother, one who leaves a cat with the other. The brother who takes the cat, lives alone in his apartment though his boyfriend, Owen, asks about moving in together. The story is told in short sections, which keeps the story moving at a fast clip. A co-worker at a university is introduced, the cat gets sick, and reflections on the past are brought up. There are thoughts about life with the estranged brother, and a slight mystery resolved about where the cat’s name comes from – All leading to a satisfying, though predictable, conclusion.

    I enjoyed this story. I liked the narrator, and wanted to learn more about him, especially his relationship with Owen, and their creation of a, I want to say, unit, as family isn’t quite right. The way Bryan Washington brought in these pieces, to make a mosaic of the narrator’s life, showing how connections sometimes happen and are thrust on the narrator, but still have value and meaning to him, was engrossing. As I thought about all of these pieces, I began to see the underling structure of the story, A+B=C. That’s not a knock against the writer, but to me shows someone knows how to craft a story.

    Like a good magician, Washington’s “Foster” is a story with a lot of sleight of hand happening. You’ll enjoy the trick while also knowing how it was done.

  • Talking to Friends

    I had a friend come in town the other day (We’re back to doing that again. Awesome!) and we planned on going out to get a drink and talk. “You’re going to sit and talk?” my kid asked. “Pretty much.” “Why?” “That’s what grownups do.” She shook her head at me, “That’s boring.”

    Now, my wife’s birthday is coming up, and you know what she wants more than anything? To go out with friends and talk. Minus a husband and a kid. Our daughter was again disappointed that this is what her mother wanted to do on a birthday. “All you do is talk,” the kid concluded.

    She’s not aware that she does talk a lot, as she talks to me and her mom all the time. Soon, my kid will start talking and communicating with her friends constantly. I’m trying to value the conversation time I have with her, because it’s a cycle; she’ll form those life long important bonds and enjoy just talking to friends.