Tag: Writing

  • Best of 2025: Most Viewed Post that Wasn’t a Review – An Open Letter to the Bots from China Flooding My Site

    FYI – My site is still being bombarded by bots from China.

    Greetings Bots from China,

    Welcome to my blog. I know you have been poking around her for the past month and a half, but we haven’t formerly been introduced to each other. So, hello! I’m Matthew Groff.

    And you are? (Please feel free to leave your answers in a comment.) (In fact, anyone who is reading this should feel free to leave a comment.) (And feel free to subscribe as well.)

    Like I said, I have noticed that you bots have looking at all of my posts, and also have been doing searches on different topics. I hope you are finding my posts interesting, and if something does tickle your interest, please give it a “like.” It helps drive traffic, I get a little more money, which will allow me to post more. You, you get how it works.

    I know that there is a chance that you bots are scrubbing my site, stealing my words, ideas and thoughts. If true, it’s not the nicest thing to do, especially if you reuse my intellectual property and try to pass it off as your own. Not cool, and I would hope that you stop.

    But there is a chance that you bots are AI training, and I would like to suggest that this might not be a good idea for you. First of all, I am flattered that you would think that my site would be positive place for your AI to get a better understanding of the world, and how humans think. But if you do go back to when I started the blog in 2017, you’re going to find a bunch of type-o’s and some really bad sentences. (Type-o’s are still a problem if I’m honest, so beware…) I say all of this because you might be teaching your AI to be rather quippy, to use too many non-sequiturs, and share lots of references to shit no one cares about. The again, if you want your AI to sound like an early middle-aged Gen-X white male who grunged too much in his teens and twenties, then you might be in the right place.

    Anyway, I hope you bots found what you’re looking for, and move on your way. I don’t know if you know this, but there are a ton of people out there that blog about home improvement stuff, which I’m sure will be fertile ground for you.

    Wish you the best but please go away,

    Matthew

  • Best of 2025: Best in Show – Taking and Keeping Notes

    I wrote this blog back in 2022, and no one, nobody, looked at it… And then all of a sudden, people started looking at it. You got me, but I’ll take it.

    So, without further ado, here is the Best in Show for 2025 – Taking and Keeping Notes

    Taking and Keeping Notes

    I had this great idea for a story this morning. I was in the kitchen, making the kid’s lunch for school, and it just hit me like lightening. I remember thinking that it was a great idea that I should work on today, but I should finish making the kid’s lunch, and then I’ll jot down some notes. By the time I finished making the lunch, the idea left my body… and I cannot for the life of me remember what it was.

    Nothing

    I tried retracing my steps, doing what I was doing when the idea hit me, but nothing has worked. The idea is lost to the universe…

    Now as I sit here blogging, I wonder, is this just the normal forgetfulness of life, or am I getting older?

    Most likely, a little of both.

    More importantly, I have never had a good system for taking notes. Even in school, like in junior high, I was taught a note taking system, which it’s really just bullet points. I still use to this day, and it sucks. It’s not real coherent, or logical, but I keep using it – never improving on it. The other weekend, we were cleaning out the office, and I found a couple of legal pads that had meeting notes from the second to last job I had, and my notes aren’t really helpful, as I can’t really understand what I was taking the notes for. That could also be a sign that the job wasn’t very good.

    Some people are great at taking notes, and cataloging things. I was rather impressed with several friends for listing all the books and movies they watched in the past year. Not only did they have an impressive count, but I thought it was equally impressive that they had the wherewithal to just follow through on collecting that information. That is, if they were telling the truth. People do lie on the internet.

    As this is a new year, and I seem to lack the ability to remember things, I will need to step up my note game, or outlining, or just keeping track of shit. I am getting older.

  • One More Before the Year is Over

    I have a good feeling that I won’t get back to blogging until the New Year. Even then, the first week back, I’ll post all the “Best of…” for 2025. So, it’s more like I won’t really be back to writing for about two weeks.

    It’s time to wrap up 2025, and I did just get back from Christmas in Texas. It was a good trip. Got to see all the family, and even had a chance to hang out with the old college gang. The only thing that wasn’t so great was the fact that it was in the 80’s the whole time we were there. It was Summer in December. And all we had to wear was winter clothes. Oh well… I just can’t escape the heat sometimes…

    As for 2025 –

    Personally, my life is pretty good this year, and I really can’t complain. We’re all healthy, doing well, getting by, and having fun.

    Professionally, things aren’t too bad either. Blog is still growing – this was the best year in views and visitors, “likes” were up compared to last year, and the number of comments were exactly the same as the previous year. I got a review published at Split Lip, and though I wrote fewer stories, I felt that my quality is improving.

    Doing all of this probably will never not feel like screaming into a void, but I do appreciate those of you that took the time to read what I wrote. You shared with me the most precious thing of all; your time. And for that, I am deeply honored.

    Moving on to 2026 – sure would be nice to get another thing published. Oh, getting out of debt would be cool, too! Completing the writing of a book, maybe losing ten pounds, getting to see a World Cup match live would be neat. But I think I would like to improve as a husband, and as a father. Also, be a better son, brother, and uncle. Oh, and growing and being a better friend as well. I guess I would like to be the type of person I would like to hang out with. Oh, and read more. Always could read more.

    So, I hope 2025 wasn’t too hard on ya, and I sure do hope your 2026 is a hell of a lot better.

    Thanks again for reading this little squeak is a world of squawks.

    • Matt Groff

  • ODDS and ENDS: Most Annoying Thing in the World, Dogs in Sweaters, and Christmas Lights

    (City lights and business nights…)

    I have a canker sore on the bottom of my tongue. Sweet Lord in Heaven, it is the most annoying thing in my life right now. It hurts a little, sure; that little sting of pain when I eat or talk or swallow or brush my teeth, or do anything like laying in bed. But what is really annoying is how I am thinking about it all the time. Can’t eat anything too spicy, and don’t talk too much, because you might droll on yourself. I ate a cookie last night, and it hurt like hell on a stick, so now I have second thoughts about eating a cookie. And this is the time of year when you’re supposed to eat cookies freely and openly and without thought… I’ve had the canker sore for three days now, and I know me, which means that I have about four more day to go before it decides to move on its way.

    Dogs in sweaters is just funny to me. I’m not knocking dogs in sweaters, as some little guys do need them. But on the whole, when I see a dog in a sweater, it makes me think the dog is playing dress up. Like the dog has a little closet of clothes to pick from. But like I said, some dogs need a sweater. Case in point:

    I love New York City at Christmas time. People are generally in a good mood, and there is a buzz around here during the Holidays. And then there are the lights; colored lights are everywhere. But what I like most when it comes to lights are the Christmas Trees people place in front of their windows; decorated and lit up. Like silent home guards watching over the City.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Tired, Mushroom Stock, and Writing in a Cafe

    ODDS and ENDS: Tired, Mushroom Stock, and Writing in a Cafe

    (Have you got nothing to say?)

    I need more sleep. I think I have been saying this since I was fifteen years old. And I like naps, but what I am here to talk about is that I need more of the bedtime type of sleep. And what I also need is for my body to stop waking up between 5:30a and 6a in the morning. That I think is what is holding me back. Sure, I could go to bed earlier – that’s logical. But what is more logical is for my brain to stay turned off until 7a or 8a. That would be the biggest help. See, if I go to bed at 9p to 10p, my body wakes up at 5:30a. If I go to bed at midnight or 1a, again, the body wakes me up at 5:30a. I’ve tried to explain to my brain and body that all the cool shit in the world happens between 11p and 2a – its a magical time. So, if we could adjust that internal wake up call, then all parties would be happy. Could you do that for me?

    I make my own mushroom stock for Thanksgiving. I’m not bringing this up to toot my own horn here, as the recipe I use is stupidly simple. Anyone could do it. No, the reason I bring this up is because not too long ago, at least in Manhattan anyway, it was easy to get mushroom stock at virtually any grocery store. Then all of a sudden it disappeared. Couldn’t get it anywhere. I could order it online, but to do that, I had to buy in bulk, like six cartons, when all I needed was just one quart. Same thing with shrimp/seafood stock. It just disappeared from the store shelves.

    I write in a cafe now. Not all the time, but a few days a week. Nothing special here, just something that I started doing again. It took about a month, but now the guys who work at the cafe recognize me, and get my coffee ready when I walk in the door. It’s a part of being a “regular” in New York City that makes living here cool.