Tag: Procrastination

  • That’s One Half-Assed Blog Post

    Sometimes you show up to dance, and then you don’t feel like dancing.

    I am 100% forcing myself to write something, anything, as I am running out of time today. The goal here, as it is every day, is to at least write 250 words. And for the past hour, I have been looking at Wikipedia pages, and listening to music. I also digressed to looking at Block Island on a map, and thought about making plans to go there. Though, I’m pretty sure I won’t be going there this year.

    See, I had a real tight schedule today to get everything done. This included moving the car, grocery shopping, journaling, working out, and getting a blog done. The one thing that looks like it will get left off is reading a new book of short stories that I have, and have also been putting of reading for a month now. I thought if I scheduled time to read, instead of reading when I felt like it, I would get a jump on the book… didn’t work out like I thought.

    I do have a procrastination problem. I can admit that.

    I think if I had a choice, I would always choose a nap. And that’s what I have been fighting all day.

    But here I am, trying to check all the boxes for today. Trying to feel like I accomplished something. That I followed through when I said I would. I do have a good chunk of the day left, but that will be occupied by picking up the kid and getting her to soccer practice.

    Okay, that’s 273 words. That’ll do.

  • Just Not Feeling It

    I know the conventional wisdom here is that you have to fight through it, but I’m questioning that. I have been looking at my computer, and listening to music for the past forty-five minutes, and I can’t come up with a single idea to write about. I did some free association journaling for about twenty minutes, and nothing came of it except me complaining about all the bills I have to pay.

    That leaves me to the tried and true “I have nothing to write about so I’m gun’na write about not having anything to write about,” trope! Ta-Da!

    I might have shot myself in the foot by deciding this morning that I was going to use my afternoon to research magazine/lit journals that I want to submit to, and not use that time to work on new material. It was like that part of my head just shut off, and now I am left with nothing but an urge to look at my phone to see if anything has happened.

    I checked; nothing is happening…

    But I’m not going to beat myself up over this. Somedays you get the bear, and other days, the bear gets you.

  • The Ol’ Sick Kid Bit

    I had plans today, but the kid got sick. Well, she got sick at school and I had to go and pick her up. I mean, she woke up early and wasn’t feeling the best, but she said it was only a headache and she could deal with it. Then, when she got to school, she started feeling worse, and her teacher called me to say that I should come and pick her up.

    Which I did. And she didn’t look good when I got her. Real pale, and whimpering a little, too. Just a sad sack. When we got home, she took a nap right away. She never takes naps, so the fact that she took one leads me to believe that she actually wasn’t feeling good.

    As for my plans… they’re shot to hell. I got the laundry done, and I will get a blog out today. Yet, I doubt I will make it to my journal, and there was this rewrite of a flash piece that I wanted to complete.

    But… We just watched an old David Tennant Doctor Who episode. That was kind’a cool.

    But… I’m still not getting my work done.

    At some point I have to start asking myself if I’m being a good dad, or am I rationalizing my procrastination? You know, using the kid as an excuse.

    I feel like I should be doing more, creating more, and then I also have this feeling come over me that none of this really matters. It is a fool’s errand that I am on; somehow thinking that any of this amounts to something.

    If it gives me purpose? If it means something to me? Does that have value?

    You know, following my bliss only seems to lead me introspective questions.

  • ODDS and ENDS: End of the Season, No Room, and 25-5

    (All This Can Be Yours…)

    Tottenham has two matches left to the season, and I think the best that they can do is 6th place. I predict that Spurs will lose to Brentford, and then end with a win against Leeds. There is still a chance that Tottenham will qualify for the Europa League, or the Europa Conference League next season, but being how tough the last several matches have been, they could burn out easily. I would like to see them win a trophy next season, any trophy. But all of that will depend on the next manager and if Harry Kane sticks around.

    I’m running out of room for books in my apartment. And, I have about nine file boxes in storage of more books that the wife and I have collected. I refuse to get rid of the books. That just feels like abandoning your child. Yet, I also feel compelled to go book shopping this weekend.

    I should get a move on, you know. I was able to write these first to sections of this post rather fast, and now, for the past hour I have been trying to come up with a third paragraph. Not sure why I hit this block all of a sudden. I started looking out the livingroom window, and everything just ground to a halt. I was thinking about the kid at school, and how close Summer is, and if we were going to be able to get a vacation up to Maine this year. (Rather late in the year, so I’m thinking not.) Just random idea after random idea, but nothing solid that would lend itself to a narrative. Has anyone heard of the 25 – 5-minute rule? You work for 25 minutes, and then give yourself a 5-minute break. It’s supposed to help you stay focused and not burn out. Huh?

  • ODDS and ENDS: New Schedule, Rewriting, and August 6th

    (I do less before 9am, than most people do all day.)

    The kid is out of school for summer which means that stay-at-home-dad’s school year schedule has been thrown out the window. I know it isn’t my job to “entertain” the kid every moment of the day, but it does mean that I am her go to person for questions, and just about everything else. The quandary I find myself in is when do I write? I was knocking out blogs in the morning, but as of this week, the time is hard to find. I might have to write at night and publish in the morning. Or, whatever. I’ll figure out the new schedule.

     While I was on vacation, I didn’t do much writing, though I did spend a bit of time thinking about it. What I came up with is that I have to rewrite a story. And it’s a story that I have rewritten three times already. And it’s a story that I have submitted to four different lit journals. Not that it matters, as the chance of it getting published, even if it is rewritten, are slim at best. I just can’t stop tinkering with it. On one hand, I want to get it right, and on the other hand, I wonder if I keep messing with it as a form of procrastination?

    Premiere League starts up on August 6th. Well, that’s when Tottenham’s first match is.