So, the part of this song that gets stuck in my head is the refrain of “Most of All” at 1:22. Don’t know what it is, but it just plays in a loop in my head. Not a complaint because I love this song.
“Flash Light” is the song I think of when someone says Parliament or George Clinton, or Bootsy Collins (even though Bootys doesn’t play in this song,) or funk music in general.
See, I made a friend, a best friend, in 9th grade and as all best friends do, he introduced me to the wonderful world of funk. I think I had seen Parliament an SNL rerun, but I knew nothing about them. That’s when my friend stepped in and filled that gap I didn’t know I had. He helped me understand what the “Great Rock n’ Roll Swindle” was, how funk influenced hip hop and rap, and the importance of “on the one.”
(The short story “Marseille” by Ayşegül Savaş appeared in the April 7th, 2025 issue of The New Yorker.)
Illustration by Virginie Morgand
Old friends are the best friends you can have! There, I said it, and I am willing to die on this completely uncontroversial hill! See, I know that my old friends, some that I have known since grade school, have made my life better, funnier, and have given me perspective in immeasurable ways. Mainly because we have grown older together. Reading “Marseille” by Ayşegül Savaş reminded me of the virtues of having old friends.
Here’s an Overly Simplistic Synopsis: Amina, who recently had a baby, goes out for a weekend in Marseille with two of her old university friends, Alba and Lisa.
I try to keep an open mind, and not to jump to conclusions when I start reading a story, but by the time I made it to the third paragraph, and read that this was going to be a story about three old friends going away for a weekend, the cliché and trope sirens started going off in my head. And I can admit that I was totally wrong for doing that. Though, I feel that this “red herring” of a situation was part of Ayşegül Savaş’ plan all along, lulling us in to the story.
The story’s opening paragraph describes how Amina and her husband have been trying to give each other space and time away from each other, in an attempt to reclaim their lives, “which had been on hold since the baby was born.” So, from the start, the premise of the work is reclaiming one’s self, even after change has occurred. And as we follow Amina and her friends around for these few days, that theme is repeated, in which change is coming, or has already occurred.
And Ayşegül Savaş handles this theme very smartly. Again, so many times this story could have fallen into the land of middle-aged people tropes, but it never goes there. For one reason, our three characters aren’t that old, perhaps just entering into their thirties. The other way this theme is handled well is that Amina comes into contact with three women, two in the setting of the story and one as a memory, over the stretch of the piece; the first is a new mother on the train out to Marseille, the next is an older woman that explains that desire goes aware after giving birth but will return, the third is a young woman on the ferry ride. It’s as if Amina encounters her present self, her future self, and her past self – these interactions don’t represent warnings of the future, or regrets of the past, but are more like mile posts signaling the changes that happen in life. But what I appreciated most that this was a story about three friends who discover that they have changed by getting older, and still remain friends.
In the end, “Marseille” is a story about that moment that we all know is coming – that moment when we get the first hint that we aren’t young anymore.
The wife and I had a good friend come in from out of town yesterday, and we all went to lunch. I had this thought, more like an understanding, which was that this wouldn’t just be lunch – this would be a hang out. And I was correct. We grabbed lunch, and then headed back to our place, and hung out, catching up, for several hours. The wife made queso, and I made drinks. My wife had the foresight to get all of her work finished for the day before our friend came over; I held out hope that somehow I would find the time to get my stuff done after he left. A couple of drinks told me that I wouldn’t work yesterday. But… I’m not really upset by that. It had been years since we had seen our friend, and spending time with people you care about is never wasted time
There is a Trader Joe’s in Harlem! It opened yesterday! Holy Shit! Everyone is going to the Trader Joe’s in Harlem! And it’s about time! I am a huge fan of quality items sold at affordable prices…
The kid is away at camp, and yesterday, I got a letter in the mail from her. The letter was short, very cute, sweet, and made me almost bust out in tears and cry my little dad heart out. Even thinking about the letter makes me choked up. Fatherhood is an amazing adventure, showing me that I have more love and compassion than I thought I contained.
As I keep aging, and time continues on – I am so grateful that I have old friends. People that have known me from adolescence to awkward adulthood; and vice versa. We don’t see each other as much as we should, and text seems to be to communication platform of choice. But man, even this morning, with a few simple texts, I was laughing and feeling so much better about everything. It’s great having people who know how to push the right buttons.
My wife found this picture online the other day:
It’s for a product that you can find at Wal-Mart, and I want to say that I am in no way endorsing or criticizing the need or use of this product… But I will say that I think the cat in this photo is formulating a plan to kill their owner while they sleep.
I have noticed lately that I keep finding news stories in my feed about people whose side hustle has started earning them six figures. This “side hustle” is usually making print on demand items with funny phrases on it, dog walking, or reviewing products for Amazon. This reminds me of all the “get rich quick” schemes from the 80’s; MLM, work from home, shady investing… Has anyone thought about a side hustle which you are a consultant to help people figure out what their side hustle should be?
Finally, and I mean FINALLY, it was an Autumn Morning around here in New York City. It was in the upper fifties, there was a breeze, you could put a sweater on – all the boxes were checked. For me, a person who hates the heat and humidity of Summer, this was like my birthday and Christmas morning all wrapped in one. Now we can turn the A/C’s off, leave the windows open, hell, maybe even have a cup of hot tea in the afternoon, but that one might still be a month off. Anyway, the season has changed. We are no longer stuck in something, but moving towards something different, and new.
The other day, a friend from college was in town, and we got together for lunch. This particular friend I hadn’t seen in close to ten years, so I was looking forward to catching up. It was a good time, and I wish it could have been longer, but we made the most of what we had. As I get older, and have more of these catchups with friends, I am still impressed with how much people can change, while at the same time still stay that core person I met twenty years ago.
It’s sports season for me, which on some level still feels odd for me to say. Growing up, my identity was brooding artist, so I couldn’t like sports. I have evolved out of that (A story for another day) and now I find myself enjoying the sports time of year. The Premiere League has started, as has the NFL. And let’s not forget about the Champions League and all of their exciting corrupt bullshit that is amazing to watch. Baseball is heading for the playoffs, and I will flirt around with following the Knicks, but I never go through with it. As I was sketching out this idea, I started wondering why have I latched on to sports so much in the last ten years? What is it about being middle aged and following as many different competitions as possible? I wonder if there is something to not wanting to admit that the people playing all of these sports are half my age, and by living through their accomplishments, I attempt to regain youthful physicality? Ha! I was never physical! I think it’s because sports are the only appointment TV left.
