Tag: #Novelist

  • Knowing When to Give Up

    Lot of stuff happened this weekend; Nor’easter, sledding, digging out the car, and teaching the kid how to play UNO. Big weekend.

    Personally, the big one for me is that I came to the decision that a novel that I have been working on, on and off, for about five years, just isn’t going to work. It’s time to put it to bed, send it on its way, give it a its Viking Funeral, and so on and so forth.

    I had some big ideas about tackling male fragility and toxicity, white privilege, the social impact of a value-based economy, forgiveness, and being anonymous in a rapidly connected world. There was a lot going on there, and that might just be the problem. I liked many of the elements that I developed, including the subplot with a hermit in the woods around Phoenicia, NY, but… maybe it was never going to work.

    I really like the first chapter, and when I was thinking about it this weekend, that’s when the idea hit me that maybe the first chapter should just be a short story, and leave it at that. But to leave it at that, I need to go and do some work on it.

    I have started to feel like I don’t have enough time for all the things in life I want to do. I might not have as much time as I think. And because of that, how much time do I want to spend on things that aren’t working?

    I now see in my life that I hung around in situations that weren’t working because I was afraid of quitting. There were relationships, work situations, and even creative projects that I hung around in, even though I had that feeling in my gut that it wasn’t working, but my pride said I wasn’t allowed to quit.

    So, the novel is dead. Long Live the Novel.

  • Sally Rooney is Publishing a Book in September

    My Google newsfeed gave me five stories, right now, about Sally Rooney publishing a new book this September.

    I’m not trying to get all algorithm conspiracy on you, but I think something is up.

  • Process: Talking About a Story

    I fully admit that I am a superstitious/neurotic writer, and it’s annoying to everybody, especially me. I follow silly rules that have no logical basis with the belief that somehow adhering to these guidelines will guarantee success.

    Such as; I can’t reuse a character’s first name, I can’t work on fiction until I journal first, and the big one, don’t talk about details of a story until it’s finished, because if I were, then the story will never get finished. The last rule has been tricky when it comes to this blog, which leaves some of my posts so vague that they are incomprehensible.

    Last night, I broke the no talking rule with my wife. (Yes, I don’t even tell my wife about my work until it’s done.) And it needed to happen.

    The context here is that I have been working, on and off, for about a year, on a story based upon a person I used to work with, and who my wife also knows. I have told no one about this story, obviously, and this co-worker came up in conversation last night. As in, “Whatever happened to what’s their name?” We talked about the possible fate of this person, and why they were such a challenge to work with.

    And that’s when I was like, I should share this idea, and why I am curious to attempt to write a story about them. Also, I wanted feedback if it was a good idea.

    The jury is still out, as the wife pointed out everything that I knew was problematic about the story… so it needs still more work if it is ever to see the light of day.

    The bigger point here is that I still have several self imposed barriers that I need to break through. The “talking” rule is bullshit as what really does is try to protect me from any criticism. If I never share, then I can never be wrong.

    I still got a long way to go, but working on it.

  • Rewriting is a Skill

    I fully believe that rewriting is a skill. A skill that I do not possess.

    I am trying to make a better effort this time around at rewriting. Really putting my mind to it. Making notes on the first draft, formulating an outline, crafting the words to build the story. And I just about hate all of it.

    As I get older, I begin to see patterns in my life. One pattern I see is my attraction to acts of immediacy in the arts. I love Jack Kerouac, Jackson Pollock, and Jazz. The theatre I have been the most successful at has been puppetry, which has been like pick up the puppet and go perform.

    It has been an artistic life and philosophy of, “First thought, best thought.”

    Yet, when it comes to my writing, my first thought is not the best thought. I have to work at a best thought.

    I remember a theatre professor back in college who told us that we had to learn to appreciate all the steps in the process of being an actor. Not love all the steps, just appreciate. You can’t be an actor if you hate auditioning, as the hatred of that step will come through when you try to get a job. But if you respect that step, then you will hone the needed skills that will help you audition, which helps you get to the next step.

    That’s where I feel like I am coming to. I don’t like rewriting, but I have first drafts that need reworking, and this is the next step in the process.

  • Ghost of Kilgore Trout

    If you know who Kilgore Trout is, then you are someone who has read Vonnegut. If you have read Vonnegut, then you most likely love him, because he’s the type of writer you either love or hate; not many in the middle.

    I always felt that Kilgore was created as a character to reflect how Vonnegut felt about himself as a writer, and the fear most writers have. Thus by creating this embodiment, the fear becomes knowable, and therefore manageable.

    If you don’t remember, the Kilgore Trout character was a great writer who could only get published in the worst magazines published. This lack of publication status causes Trout to doubt his abilities as a writer, and lose his grip on reality.

    I think Vonnegut touches on a very interesting modern anxiety; achieving your dream, but you still don’t get the validation you seek.

    I think about Kilgore Trout often.