Tag: #Love

  • Planning Home Projects

    General Update – The car got fixed, you know, from yesterday. It was the engine thermostat that needed to be replaced. Cost over $1,200 to get it fixed. But the car is back, and all is well in the Universe.

    The other thing that happened yesterday was that the air conditioner that we ordered arrived a day early. See, this winter, we got rid of the a/c unit that was in the kid’s room – it was over six years old, and had seen better days. The plan here is to move the unit in the livingroom (6,000 btu) into the kids room, and replace it with a larger and more powerful (8,000 btu) unit. 6k btu might be overkill in the kid’s room, but it just wasn’t cutting it in the livingroom. (Also, the end of March is a great time to buy an a/c as they are all on sale, to move out last year’s inventory for the new in prep for Summer.) BUT, before all of this installing can happen in both rooms, we need to repaint the windows and trim, so everything will be matching, and the apartment looks a little more unified.

    I say all of this because, as I was hauling the unbelievable heavy a/c unit up three flights of stairs, I was excited for all of the home improvement projects we have. You know of the a/c and window project. Then there is redoing our “mudroom” area by the front door, and replacing the livingroom ceiling fan. There is the touchup painting in our bedroom, and hopefully coming up with a better closet situation. The biggest project of them all is working on the kid’s room. It reflects the interests of an eight-year-old, and not the aspirations of a soon to be teenager. Not sure how to accomplish that, nor what budget for it will be, but I know that it’s important to the kid, so it’s important to me.

    I say all of this because what it really means is that we are coming out of Winter. We can open the windows again, and let the breeze blow through. There is a wonderful peace and tranquility that comes from this time of year. It is fleeting though. Soon, it will be too hot and steamy in the City, and the windows will close up and the a/c’s will roar on. If it’s a good year, we’ll have a comfortable Spring until early June. If it’s a bad year, we’ll be locking up in May.

  • Spring Break Broke Me (Unedited)

    I take full responsibility for my actions. Let’s start with that.

    The kid has been on her Spring Break for the past week, and on the whole, I have enjoyed the time we have spent together. The older she gets, the more fun she is to talk to. She very smart and a very opinionated kid, which makes conversations with her enjoyable because she is very passionate in what she believes in. She’s at a fun age when the world is brand new and just waiting for her to explore it. I didn’t try to over schedule her, but we did some fun stuff like spend an afternoon at the Whitney Museum, and we shot some arrows over at Gotham Archery in Brooklyn.

    But I did make a mistake with this Spring Break; I fell out of my routine. This was the kid’s Spring Break, not mine. For some reason, I got it in my head that I was also going to enjoy some “time off.” Unfortunately, this was a miscalculation, as you see, when you are a stay at home parent, you never really get a day off. Your job is to keep the family on track and moving forward. This I lost sight of.

    What I ended up creating in myself was a feeling of anxiety, and the sense that I was letting “everything” fall behind. Everything was taking longer to do, and thus created situations where I wasn’t able to complete the tasks that were important to me; mainly writing and catching up on my reading. But if I took time for myself, then I started feeling guilty, and then those feelings rolled up into a ball angst, as I wasn’t doing enough for my family.

    I chalk this up on bad planning, and too high of aspirations, on my part.

  • Earworm Wednesday: It’s Blondie!

    I woke up this morning and “Heart of Glass” was in my head. And I think I wrote about Blondie and “Heart of Glass” before, but you know what, I think I’m going to do it again.

    I think for most people my age, when you say disco, the Bee Gees and Saturday Night Fever are the first things that pop into your head. For me, it’s been “Heart of Glass” since I first head it. Which is funny because me and just about everyone else would never say that Blondie is a disco band – punk and new wave, clearly.

    Then, when I was in my 20’s, the song took on a whole different meaning. Instead of being a silly disco song, I started to appreciate the juxtaposition of the tragedy of loss of the love in the song, with the upbeat infectious driving dance beat. To me, it encapsulates the feeling of monumental life altering infatuation that could evolve into love, but deep down you know its doomed, but these feelings are so intoxicating that you can’t say no to them. You embrace the coming train wreck, though you know better.

    Give me a year, I’ll probably write about this song again.

  • Day Off with the Kid (Unedited)

    You know, I never really feel like I have a day off. Today, President’s Day, is a day off for the kid. She slept in, video chatted with friends, did homework, read a little from her new book, and generally has been a really good kid. I don’t think she’s brushed her teeth yet, hence why I am holding back and giving her a “generally good” rating.

    Me? I had to get all the normal Dad stuff accomplished. The feeding of everybody, and doing laundry, and making sure this home runs smoothly. Not that I am complaining, but it’s not till 4pm that I get a chance to sit down and do this; put a blog up.

    But something that has become painfully clear to me know is that I am running short on days that she will sit around the apartment with me. I can’t stop her from getting older, and more than I can stop myself from getting older. Soon, on days like this, she’ll be off to her friend’s place to hang out. I wouldn’t call this a melancholic thought; more like a dark realty of the world that is barreling toward me whether I’m ready or not.

    The solid truth that I hold to is that as my kid gets older, that this is the most enjoyable age to be with her. Like the baby phase was great, and who doesn’t love a snuggly cute baby! But, the kid now has opinions, and can make jokes, and likes to show me stuff that’s she learned, and it is infectious to be around a person who’s view of the world is still optimistic and exciting. I like this age. And in another year when she’s a teenager, that will be the best time! and so on and so on.

    This might just be the fastest eighteen years of my life.

  • Political Observation While on Christmas Vacation

    For Christmas, we went home to Texas to see family and friends. We had a good time, and did all the fun family stuff for the Holidays: wrapped gifts, ate too much, drank a little too much, laughed a lot, caught up, enjoyed the Season, and laughed some more.

    With all of this merriment, there was one thing that I wanted to avoid, which was talking politics. One reason was that I just wanted a break from the doom and gloom and unending aggression and conflict. Another reason was that I just wanted to have a good time with the people I love.

    I do love my friends and family, and I am very fortunate (I do mean this) that I have a large group of people in my life that are all over the political spectrum. It can make conversations interesting and heated, but it also keeps me grounded. My conservative friends and family remind me that conservative people all don’t think the same, they’re not all MAGA, and do make some good points. Same goes for the liberal and moderate people as well – they are good at defending/explaining their beliefs as well.

    Though I tried to dodge the trap of talking politics, it always comes up.

    BUT! I did observe two very interesting conversations that came up across the board, no matter who I was talking to – conservative/liberal/moderate. They were:

    1. Interest in Zohran Mamdani
    2. Tired of Fighting, Let’s Get Things Done

    Everyone is interested in Zohran! Maybe not everyone agreed with his policies, but everybody talked about how much they liked the guy. And with us being from New York City, all of our friends and family kept on asking us questions about him, if we voted for him, do we think his plans will work. The other interesting thing was that they all had seen at least one of his videos. What I think it all came down to was that they all felt he was “the new thing” in politics, and they wanted to know more about him.

    The second observation I thought was the more profound one; everyone wanted to stop fighting/arguing and just get things done. They all explained it in their own unique ways, but what I got is that everyone is tired and frustrated with feeling like they are constantly being pitted against someone or something, and the result is that nothing changes. To that end, everyone started asking why aren’t we compromising, or why aren’t we electing people who can compromise, or at least work to a solution?

    Sure, this is completely anecdotal, but talking to our friends and family about this gave me the feeling of hope. A slight, little, tiny hope which maybe, might be signaling that this antagonistic/zero sum/winner take all politics could possibly, just sort of be showing the first signs of cracking.

    Wouldn’t that be nice?