Tag: #LitMags

  • Feeling Off Today (Unedited)

    The day feels off. In fact, it felt a little off right before I went to bed.  Then in the middle of the night, the kid woke me up, which was right after midnight, so it was like the day did in fact start with an issue. I think the kid needed to blow her nose. That was the problem I was tasked with solving. Which I did, and then put her back to sleep.

    And since then, it’s really been off.

    I got back to sleep but never really fell into a deep sleep; I was always aware that I was just barely asleep.

    So, this morning has felt off. And I have felt frustrated.

    I rewrote my cover letter for submitting, but I haven’t been able to shake the nagging voice which keeps telling me that this is a big waste of time, and nothing will come of it.

    And as I was researching literary, again the thought of failure keep coming at me. That, again this is a futile exercise. That I don’t know enough. That I don’t belong. That That That…

    It’s exhausting constantly fighting with myself.

    I know being tired doesn’t help, but I think I need to admit that I am a little afraid too. I’m afraid to fail. I’m also afraid to be laughed at. I’m afraid too because I have nowhere to hide. In theatre, I had a character or a puppet to hide behind. With my stories, it’s all me, and that’s putting the fear in me. I feel exposed.

    But, I don’t like feeling worthless either. Not having a goal, something to work towards, is a pretty awful feeling as well.

    Gotta push through it.

  • Publishing Help

    So, I have a plan.

    And let’s not forget that when you make a plan, God laughs.

    But, I still have a plan, which is that I want to get three short stories in good shape. Meaning, a first and second draft, some editing, and then a final peer review with me asking legitimate question, and not “Did you like it?” Once I get through all of that, then I will start submitting to publications.

    Pretty simple.

    One problem though… I haven’t submitted a story in twenty years. Back then you needed to send a hard copy with a SASE. (SELF ADDRESSED STAMPED ENVELOPE) I think the world has changed a little since then.

    And that’s my point. The world of short story publishing has changed a lot in twenty years. The trouble is that I don’t even know how to get started. Back then I used to buy a copy the yearly publishers guide, and circle all the magazines that I though my work was good for. Not that I ever got published, but I always felt like that was a good starting point. Now, I’m not sure how to begin searching.

    That’s not to say that I haven’t been doing searches, because I am now starting to see ads online popping up for seminars on how to submit and get published. Anywhere from $50 to $300 will give me access to a published author who will give me all the tips and inside tracks of the publishing world.

    That can’t be real, right? If it was that simple, everyone would do it. But, I don’t have a frame of reference right now, so how do I know if that information is incorrect?

    I do also know that I am getting the cart before the horse here. I gotta have material first, if I want to submit. I just want to get started on something, have some feeling of forward motion, and to stop feeling like I’m on the outside looking in.