Tag: Life

  • The Last Time I Saw Diane (Unedited)

    (This is a follow up on my post from Monday, which dealt with the passing of my dear friend and mentor, Diane Simons.)

    I’m not 100% sure of what year it was. Somewhere between my wedding, and before my wife became pregnant with our daughter. So, that puts it between 2011 and 2013. It was in New York City, Spring or early Summer.

    Diane’s youngest daughter was performing a mime piece with another performer at P.S. 122. I’m friends with Diane’s daughter, and she tipped me off that her mother was going to be there. The wife and I had made plans to see this show, and with Diane being there, it was just a wonderful bonus. My wife had heard all about Diane, but she had never met her, so, and I won’t lie, I was excited for them to meet.

    When we arrived at the theatre, Diane, of all things, was working the “box-office” for this show. And I knew why, without anyone explaining it to me; Diane wanted to help out, and this is how she could help out. It had at least been three years, if not more, since the last time I saw her, and though she looked a little older, she still looked exactly the same. Gray hair up in a bun on the top of her head, big bifocal glasses, and the loose hippie style flowing clothing she always wore.

    Diane saw me and gave a huge smile, followed by a larger hug, ending with her holding my hand and asking me also sorts of questions. Then I introduced my wife to her, and she just about broke out in tears, hugged her, and held on to her hand as she asked her all kinds of questions to get to know my wife. It made me so happy to be ignored by Diane, as she joked and kidded and talked with my wife. We were there to see a show, so we had to leave her in the box-office and take our seats, but she asked me to not leave without saying goodbye.

    After the show, and it must have been the last performance of the piece, we got a chance to talk to Diane’s daughter, as tell her good show. Then she disappeared backstage, and Diane, me and my wife talked in the house. I have no idea what we talked about. I know it was light, and friendly, and silly, as we laughed often. All the while, Diane was holding my hand. Then she would pat my hand, but she never let go. Just held on to me, not letting me go.

    I thought I would see her again. Either through her daughter, or being that I go home to Texas just about every year, out at the theatre her and her husband ran. But, it wasn’t to be. Diane was staying to help her daughter load out, and I bet the wife and I had plans for dinner or something. I gave her a big hug, told her it was great to see her, and that I would see her again soon.

  • It’s Beginning to Feel A Lot Like Thanksgiving

    Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love the whole thing. From big family gatherings, to small family gatherings, to couples Thanksgiving, to friends-Thanksgiving, and any other combination you can throw together. Thanksgiving, with roots that go back to the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag, revived by Lincoln during the Civil War, and in our modern-day form of “That Day We Eat Before We Get Up Early to Shop,” this is a holiday that will continuously evolves to fit our needs.

    For me, it is the food holiday with a huge helping of all-day relaxing. In my little family, we buy new pajamas and spend all of Thanksgiving in them. We eat homemade cinnamon rolls, watch the parade, cook, snack, drink, and eat when the food is ready. There is no set time, we eat when we eat. Some years it’s early, sometimes late, but whatever the year, it is always relaxed and is what it is.

    This year, we have already bought our pajamas. The menu is planned, and we just have yet to do the final shopping. The decorations are out, and in place. The kid has a real job this year; she is putting together the charcutier board, and she is very excited. And, I am more excited about watching the Lions than the Cowboys. So, how’s that for a change.

    But, as I get older, it becomes more apparent that the Thanksgiving holiday is a limited resource in my life. I never doubt that each year I will have something, if not a great many things, to be thankful for. It’s just that I know that it will, eventually, change. Now, change isn’t always bad. Every year we have the chance to add to our family and friends, and welcome new people to our table. I try to be thankful, each year, that I have the people that I have in my life.

  • Autumn Memories, Sort of (Unedited)

    There is a serious Autumn chill in the air today, and it’s awesome. This was the first day that I could put on a button-down shirt, and a sweater, and a coat. Leaves are changing color in the City, and it’s getting darker earlier. My wife loves this time of year because we can leave the bedroom window cracked, making it all chilly in there, and sleep under all the comforters. (But I hate Pumpkin spice, so don’t get me started on that shit.) For a guy who loves Fall, this was like Heaven.

    As a kid growing up in Texas, Autumn didn’t start until November. And even then we had a couple of Thanksgivings were we had to run the air conditioner – not that it stopped my father from building a fire in the fireplace. Usually, by Halloween, it started to noticeably cool down at night, so you’d have to put on a sweater ort a coat. Maybe the leaves would just start changing color. I do remember several Halloweens where we were sweating while Trick or Treating. Depending on what your costume was, this could make the evening a very sweaty affair.

    Sadly, Fall in Texas was not a long season. As soon as it started, a month later it was December, and full on Texas winter. All the leaves had fallen, and it was a chilling 50 degrees out. Basically, you had one month to get all you Autumnal fun in.

    And then by March, it was Spring, and warm again.

  • Missing Sleep, and Snuggles

    Last night was a rough night of sleep for me. The wife went to be at 10, and I was going to follow her at 10:30, which is normal for us. (She needs a head start, because if we go to bed together, I will fall asleep first, and I will snore which will cause my wife not to sleep, and you can see why I don’t want this to happen.) And right as I was about to get off the couch and go to bed, the kid got up.

    She was sleep walking, and mumbling, and I quickly put her back into bed. This happens from time to time, so no big deal. Other than the fact that I was awake, and had trouble falling asleep. Then the kid did this three more times, and by 1:30 in the morning, I started to wonder if I was ever getting to sleep. We all did, but my total for the night was four hours of sleep.

    To say that I am dragging, well, that’s accurate. I have nodded off twice while trying to write this. Sure, doesn’t help that I am sitting on my bed, but still – nodding off over here. I might do a power nap before I leave to get the kid from school.

    When all of this was going on last night – the kid sleep walking and try to coax her back to bed – I thought about when the kid was a little baby, and getting her fussy little butt to calm down and get some sleep. We had a rocking chair then, and even though we normally got a few hours of sleep during that period in our life, there was an understanding that fussiness with sleep was a temporary problem, she would grow out of it eventually, and also that her being tiny and snuggly was also a limited timed offer. She wouldn’t be a snuggle bug for long.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Surprised I’m Here, Gotta Have Goals, and Sports

    (Nothin’ to do, nowhere to go…)

    I’m forty-seven years old. Not ashamed of my age, and other than a slight pot belly, I think I look rather good for my age. But for the life of me, when I was a kid, like nine years old, I never imagined that I would be this old. Well, sometimes I thought I’d be really old, like eighty, walking with a cane, shuffling around, being all grandpa like. No, when I was a kid, I thought I’d be in my twenties, and then, nothing. Thirty seemed like it was so far away, let alone forty. That some how, it couldn’t be possible that I would live that long. Not that I had some death wish, or believed I was doomed. No, it was more a matter of time. It’s time, the time it would take to become old seemed insurmountable. There just was no way that I could become that old… When I think about me at nine year old, I think he would be surprised that I am still here. And so bald…

    But the thing that makes getting older tolerable, is having a goal. Something to work towards, or look forward to. My Grandma Groff used to say that all the time when she would come and visit. That and it helps to have some spending money. But the goal thing, having something to accomplish, that has made a big difference if the last year for me. Not that it’s completely gone, but I don’t have that feeling of flounder much any more. That I’m just passing through my life, instead of being active in it.

    Growing up, we were a sports family, and then there was me; the un-athletic kid. I mean I tried. I tried my hand at baseball and basketball up through junior high. I really did love playing baseball, but I wasn’t athletically gifted; Batting ninth and right field were my lot. I took tennis lessons in high school, as my dad believed that we should do something physical, and not be a total loaf. I was pretty good at tennis, but I didn’t have the killer instinct for me to actually be competitive. After high school, I stopped playing any sort of sport. And then I had a daughter, who now is very into soccer. Which is cool, because I really like watching it. In my kid’s mind, watching soccer must mean that I know how to play soccer, right? I had written a week or so ago about helping the kid get ready for the soccer club try out. I enjoyed that, mainly because I was spending time with my daughter, but it was good being out and active. I also see in her mind’s eye that she is starting to think I am an athletic type of person. I enjoy this admiration I am receiving from her, but I know that in a year of two, it’s going to dawn on her how awkward and uncoordinated I really am.