Tag: #Kids

  • Walking in the Snow, Trying to be a Good Dad

    There’s five inches of snow on the ground. Me and the kid could barely contain ourselves as we walked to school. We both wanted to bounce through the snow and step in the places where no one had walked yet so we could make footprints and hear the crunch of the snow under our boots. We were late to school.

    I told the kid we had to hurry up, and she asked me is it her fault that she’s late? And that question made me feel sad and pitiful for her. Had I said something earlier to make her feel guilty? Had I been saying things to her this week that make her feel like she was to blame? I thought I had been doing good job of not transferring the Catholic Guilt I grew up with to her. But the way that she asked me that question, is it her fault, made me think that I hadn’t accomplished my goal.

    I had promised myself that I would raise a confidant and self-assured kid. I didn’t want her growing up like I did; afraid, worrying, low self-esteem, and neurotic. I feel like I have talked myself out of so many things that I wanted because of my lack of confidence. I still have trouble believing in me.

    Last night, I woke up at 3am, and I couldn’t get back to sleep. As I lay in bed, mind racing, that nagging voice in the back of my head kept poking at me – “You don’t have a career, you’re too old to start a new one, you aren’t that creative, you don’t know the right people, you don’t have any real friends, what create is boring and pedestrian.” I’m 45 years old, and sometimes I still feel like that 12-year-old on the first day of junior high; scared that they will all laugh at me and beat me up.

    I don’t want my daughter to think of herself that way. I want her to like who she is, and be confidant in who she is, and not be afraid. I’m doing what all parents do – I want me kid to be better than me. And most days I don’t know how to do that. But I keep trying, because we’re going sledding after school, and that’s going to be a lot of fun.

  • Covid at School

    Well, it happened. We got notice from the school that a person, who has tested positive for Covid, had been in the kid’s classroom on Friday of last week, and as such, and could have possibly come in contact with our kid, and all the students. As such, unvaccinated children, though the kid has received one shot she is not considered fully vaccinated, are to take part in remote learning. The vaccinated children are allowed to return to school, if they desire. We were also informed that being the possible exposure happened on 12/17, and it normally takes five to eight days for symptoms to appear, that means the kid would start showing signs, if infected, from 12/22 to 12/25.

    Merry Christmas!

    As such, the kid is home today. This would have been the last day of school before winter break. The kids were to have a party with pizza and watch movies. You know, like the last day of school before a vacation should be; no learning, just having fun.

    So, the kid is pretty upset. Not about possibly getting covid, but about missing her party and friends.

    The good news is that we are day two of symptoms could show up, and nothing has shown up yet. The bad news is that we are had plans to go out, and we clearly aren’t going to be doing them now. The wife and I are fully vaccinated, but still it doesn’t seem very wise for us to go hang out in public. There are a few errands that need to be run, though.

    So, this is Christmas, 2021!

  • Tooth Fairy: Redux

    So, last night, the kid had a wiggly tooth. And she is at the age where teeth are getting wiggly. She spent about five minutes in the bathroom, and then she announced that this tooth was ready to come out.

    I thought that would be the end of it, just identifying that a tooth was lose and ready to give way. But no, the kid gave it a good yank, and out popped her little tooth. She was very proud as she held it up for us to see, wrapped in bloody toilet paper.

    This all happened about 30 minutes before her bedtime, and my first thought was that we don’t have any cash. I panicked; I can admit it. I started into a story about if the Tooth Fairy doesn’t get enough notice she might not arrive. I got a very strange look from the wife and kid.

    When I got a second alone with the wife, I told her how I didn’t have any cash, so I couldn’t put a dollar under her pillow. But, the wife did in fact, have a dollar in her purse, and all was well.

    We got out the little pillow that we put teeth in for the Fairy, and made sure it was in a good spot so she could find it. And off we drifted to sleep, the kid smiling, as she was going to be visited by the Tooth Fairy and Santa Clause in the same week. What an amazing time to be a child and a magical being.

    And then I totally forgot.

    I failed at my duty as the Tooth Fairy.

    The failure was total and complete as the kid got up in the morning, holding the tooth pillow that still contained her tooth, and she looked at me and ask, “Why? Why didn’t the Tooth Fairy come?”

    “Well,” I scrambled for something to say. I thought I should return to my previous idea of the tooth coming out too late in the evening…

    “Is she made at me?” the kid asked.

    Total failure as a father. And the kid was pretty upset. The wife and I snuggled the kid on the couch. Luckily, my wife once got skipped by the Tooth Fairy when she was a kid, so we had a precedent we could fall back on.

    But man. I really dropped the ball on this one. I have set a reminder on my phone, so I don’t screw it up for a second night.

  • Kid Vaxed

    Today is the day that our kid gets their first dose of the Covid vaccine. We have waited for this day since March of 2020. I know that we are still a long way from no masks, but this will allow us to take a deep breath and relax.

    Once the second does is taken, we can go back to a restaurant as a family, or go to a movie. This will allow the kid to be outside without a mask on. And then there are playdates and maybe even sleepovers again.

    But most importantly, if for some reason one of us does become sick, all the other members of the home are now safe.

    The interesting thing that I have learned recently, is that my daughter will be in the minority when it comes to kids vaxed in her classroom. I knew that there would be parents that wouldn’t want to have their kids vaxed, and I know some that want to wait and see how things are in six months, and then get it. I thought the breakdown to vax v. not-vax would be 50/50, but it’s closer to 2/3 not vaxed. That did surprise me.

    Look, I’m going into this situation by trusting that other parents are making the best decisions for their family, also meaning that I trust that they are being responsible parents. I have seen no evidence that leads me to believe otherwise.

    Here is the interesting thing that I have noticed about this information, or at least when I share that information with friends. My more liberal friends think the parents that aren’t letting their kids get vaxed are MAGA-Trumpers, and my conservative friends think the exact same thing. I am pretty sure, like 99% sure, that the parents who aren’t letting their kids get vaxed do not support, nor did they vote, for Trump. When I try to explain that politics really isn’t playing a part in these family’s decision, my friends, on both sides, really don’t believe me. They think that not get a kid vaxed is a political decision. That there can be no other explanation.

    I don’t know why these parents aren’t vaxing their kids, because they haven’t shared it with me, and I’m not going to ask. I’m going to continue to respect other people’s family’s and the decisions that they make.

    My choice is to vax my kid.

  • Missing the Joy of the Holidays

    I have been trying to get in a Christmas mood, but it just isn’t taking. It’s a bit easier when the kid is around, but I think every parent would give that answer. We have done all the things that we normally do. We have decorated, made cookies, and gone out shopping. We have watched Christmas movies, wrapped gifts, and made our plans for Christmas-Eve.

    But it’s still not taking.

    Last year was weird, don’t get me wrong. The first Christmas under Covid wasn’t great, but it did feel a little like we were stealing a piece of normal back. That, out of all the awful changes, this was one old thing that was good to be doing. I think it also helped that Trump lost the election, and the first vaccines were going out, which made it feel like the world was getting better.

    I did think that by the time we hit December 2021, that we would be putting Covid behind us, the kid would have a vaccine, and no more masks. That’ll teach me to be optimistic.

    But, I don’t think I want to be a person that stops being optimistic. That today can still be a good day, and tomorrow can be even better. That I don’t have the answers but I know it will work out.

    It’s the old theatre adage; A shitty dress rehearsal makes for a great opening night. Today might be bad, but tomorrow it will all come together.

    Anyway, kind’a got off subject there. I was talking about Christmas and the Holidays.

    Let’s focus on the positive, as that is what I tell the kid to do.

    We are going to see a movie in a theatre this year. We’ll get lobster rolls on Christmas Eve, and Mom and Dad will toast a martini, though it might be a bourbon this year. Christmas coffee cake will be made, and the kid will not be able to sleep, anticipating Christmas morning.

    And we’ll be together. Which is what really counts.