Tag: dog shit

  • Broken Car Window Throws Off Local Man’s Day

    By Matthew Groff

    April 3, 2024, 11:37am

    When I walked out of my apartment on Tuesday morning, it was an overcast and drizzly day, which felt appropriate for having to move my car for the street sweeper, as Alt Side Parking is one of my least favorite “New York” things that I have to do, sometimes twice a week. The closer I got to my car, I noticed that the car parked behind me had their back window smashed out. “That sucks,” was my first thought. And then I saw my car…

    “This really sucks,” was my next thought.

    And though I knew that my whole day just got shot to shit, I wasn’t that upset. I called my insurance company, and got that process started. A woman came up to my car and told me that she also got her back window smashed in (four cars total got broken into) and she just called the cops who were on the way. I texted my wife and let her know what had happened, and she was pretty annoyed.

    My insurance put me in contact with a window replacement company, and I was making arrangements with them when the cops rolled up. Clearly, most people don’t put the glass people on hold, because when I told him I needed to speak to the police, he seemed annoyed with me. Anyway, I was raised that when the cops show up, you talk to them right away.

    The police took a statement from me, said they were sorry for the situation, and wanted to know if anything was stolen. A cooler bag, I said. That worth anything, the cop asked. No, it was an old cooler bag, I answered. So nothing was stolen, the cop finished. Nothing was stolen, I agreed. The cops were nice, but I think we all knew that there wasn’t anything they could do, but I appreciate the effort.

    I called the glass people back, and made arrangements for them to come replace the window on Wednesday. I went to the hardware store on the block and got some duct tape and plastic to cover up the window. The wife came out and helped me with it. Not our best work, but it would do.

    Then it really started raining.

    Then the glass people called back saying that they had to reschedule because of the three days of rain we were about to get. How does Friday afternoon sound, they asked. Not good, I said. We’ll see you on Friday afternoon, they told me.

    Then I got annoyed. Not with the glass people, because logically I get it. You can’t replace windows in the rain, as coming out to your car is their whole business. What I was annoyed at was that somehow having to reschedule made me feel like I wasn’t in control of this situation anymore.

    Then I checked on the plastic over the widow to find out that our “not the best work”, in fact, was regular “bad” work; Water was getting in the car.

    Then I really felt powerless. Three days of rain, water getting into the car, and the new window won’t show up until Friday afternoon.

    Luckily, I have a wife who can fight through my annoyance and powerlessness, when it occasionally happens to me, and found a nearby parking garage for the car to sit in for the next three days. Which is smart and makes sense, and though costs us some money, at least the car is staying dry.

    And through all of this, my annoyance and having my day thrown off, I never thought about the person who broke into my car. I never felt anger at this faceless person, or entertained feelings of wanting to get revenge, and any angsty questions of “why did this have to happen to me?”

    This whole thing feels like stepping in dog shit. This sucks, and I have to clean up my shoes, but it happens from time to time.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Old Debates, It’s Okay to Not Have Kids, and Dog Shit

    (Fries are done…)

    I have been blessed, or cursed, depending on how you look at it, with the ability to stay up very late at night, and still wake up early. Though I may need a nap in the middle of the day, it’s given me one true positive advantage; I get to watch lots of useless things. Lately, I have started watching old episodes of Siskle & Ebert. The original purpose of watching was to remind myself of good movies that I had forgotten about. But as I watched these shows, I noticed something about how Gene and Roger argued. My memory was that there were passionate about their opinions and were willing to really get in there and fight for what they believed, even to the point of personally insulting the other. Yet, when I rewatched, I was struck by how they were very respectful in their arguing. And often, they looked amused when they argued. It wasn’t at all the cat and dog fights that I remembered. In one sense, I could just chalk this up to a faulty memory and a little Mandela effect. Or, maybe, televised arguing has become more brutal and bare knuckled over the past thirty years. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but maybe people were nicer and more respectful in the past.

    Yesterday, I read about Seth Rogen and his thoughts on being married and not having kids. (Good for BuzzFeed, still staying relevant. That’s where I read it.) He made is case of what is right for him and his wife, and he did a good job of articulating his thoughts on the issue. I got a lot of married friends that don’t have kids, and I have a lot of unmarried friends that have kids. And I know some people who have kids and wish they didn’t. Look, I’m married and have a kid and I love it. I also love having one kid, and want it to stay that way. That’s what’s right for the wife and I, and we’re very happy. And no one questions our decision. Our decision gets respected, and it ceases to be an issue. I just think that courtesy should be extended to everyone, regardless of what their reason is for having or not having kids.

    But if you’re not willing to pick up your dog’s shit, then you shouldn’t have a dog. Seriously, turds are part of the deal. So, stop being a tourist and take some responsibility.