Tag: Couch

  • ODDS and ENDS: Everything is Green, Son of a Clothes Horse, and Sick Kid on the Couch

    ODDS and ENDS: Everything is Green, Son of a Clothes Horse, and Sick Kid on the Couch

    (Who said that!? Not Me!)

    …And I hope you enjoy the weird AI image that was created for this post…

    Came out this morning to do the Alt Side Parking Dance, and discovered that our little car was covered in green. The wife had parked under a tree, and now there is a fuzzy haze of pollen all over the vehicle. Besides the fact that my allergies started weeping in despair as I felt my nose simultaneously running and clogging up, I also wondered how much pollen could this car collect? Could my car have so much pollen on it that if I drove around the City, even out in the country, it would act as a pollinator? I know the bees are dying off, but if push came to shove, couldn’t we just drive are cars around to, in a very basic rockbottom way, pollenate the world? Just an idea, cause there is a crap ton of tree pollen on my car.

    First of all, let me start by saying this very loaded statement; I love my wife very much. And as such, we tease each other often, as is our want. There are many things she makes fun of me over, but one of the most recurrent jokes of her’s is to call me a “clothes horse.” Going on twenty years, she’s called me this. Until I had met my wife, I had never heard this term before. A clothes horse is a folding frame used inside someone’s house to hang laundry on while it dries, or a fashionable person who thinks too much about their clothes. (I bet you can guess which definition my wife uses for me.) Most specifically, she will uses this term towards me on days when I have a sitting around the home outfit, a running errands in the neighborhood outfit, and then a third running around town outfit. Not that I do this all the time, but it does happen; I have been known to wear three different outfits in one day. So, I was home visiting my dad the other week, and I witnessed my father doing the same thing; over the course of the day, he had three different outfits he would put on. I had never noticed that, nor thought about it, as that’s just who my father is. Now, I clearly see the depths of the influence this man has had on my life, for I am the Son of a Clothes Horse.

    The kid was sick the other night. Like very sick, and throwing up. She was weak, and needed to be comforted, which I was more than happy to do. As she gets older, the opportunity for a snuggle starts to decrease, you know. But I noticed something as we were on the couch at 2am, hoping that she would be able to keep crackers down; That when she’s sick and on the couch in the daytime, I watch whatever she wants to watch – But at night, I make the kid watch what I want to watch. Nothing inappropriate, but it’s my choice. So, the other night, at 2am, I made my kid watch the MST3k episode “Cave Dwellers.” It’s one of my favorites, and to be honest, I wasn’t too concerned with what the kid thought, as she was nauseous and going in and out of sleep. The next morning, she was feeling better, still a little under the weather, but better. And to my surprise, she was making Cave Dweller jokes – like, “I fell on my eight sided dice,” “Gotta a Minute!” and “The tapes not queued up!” I couldn’t have be prouder to be her father!

  • ODDS and ENDS: Couch or Sofa, Tottenham Fans, and “Hundreds of Beavers”

    (‘Cuz you woke up in the mornin’ with initiative to move…)

    Do you use the term couch or sofa? Do you use them interchangeable? In fact, a couch is an informal – less structured piece of furniture, while a sofa is more formal in function and design. I say all of this because I am going couch/sofa shopping this weekend. Yeah, our livingroom couch is on its last leg being that it’s kind’a broken just enough to let us know it needs to be replaced, but not broken so much as to be unusable. The wife and I are about the spend a morning, and possible an afternoon, asking ourselves the “Fight Club” question; “What kind of couch defines me as a person?” I’m going with gray, or a navy blue; That defines me quite well as a person.

    I have written before about my odd interactions with other Tottenham fans in New York. Most of the time, I see someone with Tottenham gear on, and I’ll say something to them about the team, or say “Come on you, Spurs!” They react by saying, “What?” or “This isn’t mine, I’m borrowing it.” But the other day, as I had my Tottenham scarf on, a woman yelled at me, “How about that Liverpool match!?!” She was talking about the Carabao Cup match on Wednesday where the most confusing team in all of football, Tottenham Hotspur, managed to beat one of the best teams in the world – Liverpool. But… I wasn’t able to watch the match or see the highlights, yet I knew that they had won… All I could say to the woman was, “I didn’t watch it, but I know they won!” Not the stirring response she was looking for, I know.

    And I want to end with a movie I just watched, and I might review later. It is one of the most original comedies I have seen in a very a very long time. It’s called “Hundreds of Beavers.” Just… just watch the trailer, is all I ask.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Dog Person, NYC, and The Sofa

    (Growing Equals Learning, and Vice Versa…)

    It dawned on me last night, as I was walking the dog around the neighborhood at 9pm, that I can’t go back to having a cat. I like cats, I have a soft spot for cats, and I love seeing bodega cats; they are my favorites. But I’m a dog person now. And it comes down to litter boxes. I prefer to have my animal friend relieve themselves on the street, or on occasion, in neighbor’s yard. I am totally fine with having green plastic bags on me to pick up poop. But the idea of having a box in my home that I have to clean excrement and clumping pee out of daily is a task that I never want to return to. This is not a knock against cats – it’s just that I don’t want to do that chore anymore. So, my lot is now thrown in with dogs.

    I still like living in New York. After everything that we have gone through these past three years, I still like this town. Wednesday and Thursday, I had to run errands all over Manhattan – from Harlem to the Battery, and I still find this place fascinating and thrilling, and dirty and gross, dangerous and wonderful. I fear that I might become one of those people who cannot function when away from the City. That I will be locked in a perpetual low-grade orbit of this place, never to break free.

    If my office is the couch, then I need a better couch.

  • Where I work

    I work on the couch most days. The local library was the other place that I would work, but currently that branch is closed for repairs and remodeling, which leaves me on the couch for the foreseeable future. It would be nice to have a desk to work at. That last time I had a desk was two years ago before my wife got her current remote job. Since that time, we did away with the old wooden desk, and my wife has more of a rolling/standing desk she uses in the bedroom. Maybe I’ll have a desk again, one day.

    On the whole, I like sitting on the couch. It is comfy, though that can be a disadvantage when I am tired, and it is quite easy to slink over and take a nap. But being in the living room gives me access to the stereo and the TV which is one way I can listen to music while I work, it has turned out rather ideal

    The other nice aspect of the couch office is that I have a window I can look out of. Currently, I have the view of a construction site that is putting up a sixteen-story condo/hotel. The funny thing is that I never see more than five guys working there on any given day. At this rate, it might take them sixteen years to finish it. But even before the construction, it wasn’t the prettiest view out that window. We live in the back of the building, and for years we just had two empty parking lots and autobody shop to look at. Not exactly inspiring, but it was quite most days. Now, there is the sound of a power tools, between 7am and 4pm, Monday through Friday, but outside of that…

    Still rather ideal for writing.

    (Hey! It’s a new week, which means a new chance for you to give a like, or a share, or even leave a comment on this blog. Unless you are reading this from the archive, in that case; Who won the 2024 Election?)

    (It will take some time, but that joke WILL pay off.)