Tag: #Children

  • Spending the Night

    The kid is at the age of “Peek Sleepovers.” Such as, the success or failure of a weekend can be determined if a sleepover occurs, regardless if the sleepover is a success or not. The kid has taken part in a few “slumber birthday parties,” and a weekend away with a friend whose family has a place out of the City. I do use the term “Peek” not only because the kid is super excited about having a sleepover, but also because the kids are still at the age where they will go to bed at a relatively decent hour, so we can all get some sleep. Once they get to middle school age, then it turns into staying up all night and watching movies, and there is no guarantee that I or the wife will be able to get any rest. But, as of now, the kid is happy, and that makes everyone happy.

    There other thing that I am happy for is that the kid has no issues with spending the night and being away from us. Not all kids are like that.

    I wasn’t – I went through phases though. When I was little, I had no problem sleeping over. Then somewhere around nine, it began to bother me being away from home. Like the first few hours would be fine, then all of a sudden, a feeling of dread came over me, like I would never see my family again, or ever be happy. I know that I was feeling home sick, and that’s natural, but the feeling was so controlling and paralyzing, and the only thing I could think of was getting home. And then when I got home, I was overcome with shame, that I didn’t have the courage of strength to spend the night, and, you know, be a normal kid. When friends would invite me over to spend the night, I would come up with excuses why I couldn’t.

    Then, it just all went away. The fear, the anxiety, all of it was just gone. I remember it was 6th grade, and I was over at my friend David’s house with some other kids. We all stayed for dinner, and then his parents said if we wanted to spend the night we could. There clearly was a bit of it was peer pressure to stay over, but also, I didn’t get that sinking feeling in my stomach. I remember calling my parents to ask if I could stay, and my mother asking me over and over and over if I was sure I wanted to do this. I said that I was, and then not thinking about it again. I ran home and grabbed some clothes and a sleeping bag, and I was just excited to hang out with friends, and stay up all night.

    I think we watched “Let’s Get Harry” on Cinemax because we thought it was a dirty movie. It’s not a dirty movie, it’s just a really bad and dull movie.

  • Talking to Friends

    I had a friend come in town the other day (We’re back to doing that again. Awesome!) and we planned on going out to get a drink and talk. “You’re going to sit and talk?” my kid asked. “Pretty much.” “Why?” “That’s what grownups do.” She shook her head at me, “That’s boring.”

    Now, my wife’s birthday is coming up, and you know what she wants more than anything? To go out with friends and talk. Minus a husband and a kid. Our daughter was again disappointed that this is what her mother wanted to do on a birthday. “All you do is talk,” the kid concluded.

    She’s not aware that she does talk a lot, as she talks to me and her mom all the time. Soon, my kid will start talking and communicating with her friends constantly. I’m trying to value the conversation time I have with her, because it’s a cycle; she’ll form those life long important bonds and enjoy just talking to friends.

  • Unexpected Benefits of the Chore Chart

    I’m not the best at this parenting thing, but I try. One of the things we are trying out on the kid is a chore chart, and earning money. That is supposed to teach responsibility, right? This all started because she wanted to get an LOL Doll. I wasn’t excited about her using her money for that, but that wasn’t the point. She has been diligent, worked hard, and bought the doll. She also has bought ice cream, and ice-y’s in the neighborhood. All was going as expected.

    Then, a few weeks ago, she came to me and wanted to get books about geology. Well, what she asked for were books on rocks and volcanos. We did an Amazon search, and found three books that were geared towards kids. One was $4, another was $8, and the final one was $13.

    It took her little over a week, but she earned the $4, and we got the first book. It was about 20 pages, very much geared to 6-year old’s, and was heavy on pictures of volcanos, and lite on facts other than the most basic. She read it from cover to cover quickly, but what she really wanted was a book that was about different kinds of rocks. That would be the $13 book.

    The kid set her mind to it, and worked the chore chart. She earned $8, and I did ask her if she wanted to get the book of that value. She said no, and kept working toward the $13 book. Not a single complaint came from her, and in under a month, she had the money. We ordered it from Amazon, and it was the longest Two-Day Prime delivery of her life.

    The book arrived on Tuesday, and to say that I have been hearing about rock facts nonstop would be a grave understatement. The book is attached to her, going where she goes, and the kids at the playground are getting some valuable geology lessons from my daughter. The best part, which made my heart swell with joy and bottomless love, is that she is sleeping with her book; snuggling it as best as one can do. Nope, she’s not snuggling a stuffy, or blanket, or an LOL Doll, but a 200+ page rock and mineral field guide. I didn’t see this one coming when we started this chore chart, but I think my kid really loves books.

  • This Morning with the Kid

    Some days are easier than others, you know. Today started off as a tough one for the kid. She was getting out of bed, when I went to take the dog for a walk. I could tell that she was still tired and a little grumpy. When I got back from the walk, there was a sulk on her. She was listening to her mother by getting dressed, and brushing her teeth, but the kid wasn’t into it. As my wife was putting the kid’s hair in a ponytail, the child was in a full frown. The kid went over to her desk, where her computer was to start her remote day in school, and just pout landed in her little chair.

    I went over to her, and picked her up, and just gave her a big hug. “Tough morning?” I asked.

    Her face was buried into my shoulder, but I could feel her head nodding a yes to my question.

    “Well,” I started, “today is going to get better.”

    She lifted her head to face me. “How do you know?” she asked.

    “I don’t. I just believe it will get better.”

    “Like a prediction?”

    “Sort of. But more like, I’m sure it’s going to happen.”

    “…okay.”

    I put her down, and she took her seat for the remote class. “Can we go to the park?” she asked.

    “Sure.” I confirmed.

    “Good,” the kid answered.

  • Staying in Remote Learning

    Spring Break is over for the kid, and we are back at it with remote school. When last I wrote about school, it was about the decision that the wife and I have to make about whether we would send our daughter to the school, or if we would continue remote learning. After kicking the idea around for a week, we decided that it would be best for our daughter to stay in her remote class. This is the best choice out of nothing but bad options.

    The main driving force in our decision was consistency. By switching over to blended learning, it would mean that the kid would get two new teachers; one in the classroom, and one that is remote, as this would be an every other day system. Also, NYC schools still have a policy implemented that shuts down the school if two people have positive test results. At any point, the kid could get moved to remote learning until the Department of Education gives an all clear to return. In some cases, that may take up to a week to reopen. Though I just saw on my phone that the Mayor is revising this policy.

    By staying with the remote learning, we will have a consistent teacher, who is the school’s actual kindergarten teacher, and we know, as she has been at the school for over ten years, that she is teaching the kids in the system to get them ready for first grade in that school. This, we feel, gives the kid the best foundation for continuing to succeed at this school. And it is a school that we really like, and tests academically well, so we plan on staying there.

    But, this decision means that our daughter will go this entire school year without having any kid interaction in the school, which is awful. There is all the social interaction with being around kids, learning to communicate, and make friends, and share, and all of that fun wonderful stuff. And also, learning to separate from us and be her own person.

    Like I said, there was no clear right choice. It was a decision that we hope is right, and only time will tell.