Category: Writing

  • Thanks, Alex

    I think I need to take a break from the news. I could talk about South Carolina, or that Harvey Weinstein was just found guilty on two counts.

    But what I really want to talk about is listening to Parliament.

    What has brought this about recently is that we showed the kid “Guardians of the Galaxy, and Vol. 2” this weekend, and she completely latched on to the movies, the characters, and the music. (She’s been running around the playground telling the other kids that she’s Gamora.) We added both soundtracks to a playlist for her, which means we have been listening to it pretty much non-stop. That’s not a complaint.

    Vol. 2’s soundtrack has Parliament’s “Flash Light” on it, and this is how we get all of this tied together.

    I have some time for myself this day to work in the home office, and this would make a great time to start listening to Parliament again.

    I know the first time I heard/saw them, and that was on Saturday Night Live in 1986. (I know this only because I can look it up, not that the date was seared into my brain.) Watching George Clinton, Parliament-Funkadelic did leave me a little confused, as I knew it was a band, but the music and attitude on display was not like anything I had seen before.

    Jump ahead five years, and being in 9th grade I make that friend who loves Parliament, and my music horizons are broadened in a most needed way. The Mothership Connection, and Bootsy Collins, and the funk, and for a little white kid growing up in the suburbs, it was like getting invited to the party with the cool kids.

    I mean, I want funk uncut.

  • At MOMA

    Yesterday, I took the kid to MOMA. I thought that she was at the age that we could go to a museum and she would be able to start recognizing some paintings that she had seen before in the books we have at home. I was correct, and she remembered “Starry Night,” and “Les Demoiselles d’Avignon.” And when I say “recognizing,” what I mean is that she would say, “I know that picture.” I think that’s a good start when it comes to art appreciation.

    Out of everything we looked at, the kid really latched on to Gretchen Bender’s “Dumping Core.” I don’t want try to explain it here, as the link does a better job. When we went into the little theatre space that 13 tv screens were in, I thought the exhibit would be a stimulation overload for the kid. I was surprised at how serious she took it. When we left, I asked what she liked about it, and she told me that she liked how the music and pictures worked together.

    What caught me was the Frank O’Hara exhibit. They had some of his original manuscripts, and drawings. I’m not the biggest fan of poetry, but something about his work, and how it was portrayed. It stuck with me; his work and what he was able to accomplish in his notebooks. It left me inspired, and wondering if there still aren’t new things I can learn and try.

  • Report on the Politicians, and the Reporters Who Follow the Campaigns

    I follow the politics of the country as if it were a form a reality television; It tries to imply that its real, but it’s all fake. And that fake show is reported as reality. Not that I blame the press for it, but I also feel that no one really has been honest about it for a while. Like, even the people on “The Circus: Inside the Greatest Political Show on Earth,” seem more interested in looking cool, or that they know how phony it all is, but they are right in the middle of it. I don’t think anyone has been honest about the whole fake business that politic and the reporting of politics has become sine Hunter Thompson in “Fear and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail “72.”

    I was trying to describe this to my wife the other night as the New Hampshire results were coming in on cable television. And then we switched over to watch “The Circus,” and that’s when the idea hit me; I would like to follow all the campaigns and the reporters, and share with everyone all the crazy shit that happens in the stage craft of campaigning. I’m not a reporter, so I have no idea what the ethics of that job is in those situations.  I would be an outsider peeking in.

    I wonder if I could do this, and get someone else to pick up the tab?

  • Following the Sun

    On days that I get down on myself, I remember a tory a theatre professor of mine told.

    It went along the lines of this…

    Follow your dreams no matter what. That doesn’t mean your dreams will come true, but if you are open to all the places, experiences and people that you meet along the way, your life won’t be dull, and you’ll be in a much happier place.

    I might be paraphrasing a little.

    Mainly, I have followed that advice. Some days more than others, but lately I started to think that it was just stuff you would tell a class full of people that were about the graduate. It’s a positive statement, but it also gave the professor an out; most of you aren’t going to make it, but you’ll have fun.

    And then I started getting older and seeing how other people also got older.

    It’s the dream denied that is dangerous. It’s the people who told themselves that they couldn’t do what they wanted, but never gave up wanting it, that I am seeing more and more now. Yes, I saw a ton of bitter actors in New York, but in a sense, they hadn’t given up on themselves. They were just made at everyone else succeeding.

    I now see people made at themselves. Disappointed in their choices in not trusting themselves and believing in themselves.

    This observation of middle-aged people has scared me a little. I don’t think I have become that.

    I still try, seeing where it goes.

  • Oops…

    Well… I finally did it. I sent out an inappropriate group email at work.

    I won’t get into too many details, but I immediately sent a follow up email apologizing, and taking responsibility for my actions. Just too quick on the send button.

    Also, the Gmail “Undo” function has a default setting of 5 seconds. I suggest EVERYONE go into their settings and change that to 30 seconds.

    I went into my boss’ office, and personally apologized to her as well.

    So, I embarrassed myself very badly at work today.

    Now, how do I move on? This will come up again. Someone will say something to me, in a joking or negative way, but it will happen. It will come down to my reaction; am I defensive, do I laugh it off, do I stay humble and say nothing.

    I also need to forgive myself, which I am really bad at. This is the type of thing that I will lay in bed at night, asking myself, “Why did you hit the send button?”

    I should tell myself that no one died, and no one was physically hurt, and everybody has done this at one point in their lives. We are all human.

    But I know I won’t do that. I will replay the embarrassment over and over again. That racing of my pulse when I discovered what I had done. The feeling of helplessness that I cannot undo this. The shame of being a disingenuous person.

    Everyone says that you have to learn to forgive yourself and accept that your mistakes make you who you are. But the process of getting there has no road map. I can forgive others, just not myself, most days.