I keep trying to write, but I let other things get in the way.
I mean, I’m writing now, but it’s not enough time to complete a thought.
I had the expectation that it would be easier in Summer.
I’m finding the opposite to be true.
I keep trying to write, but I let other things get in the way.
I mean, I’m writing now, but it’s not enough time to complete a thought.
I had the expectation that it would be easier in Summer.
I’m finding the opposite to be true.
So, one year ago, while still in the middle of the pandemic, having been laid off from my job, and just barely holding on to any semblance of a normal life, I decided that I would start up my old WordPress blog again, and commit to writing a post five times a week for the next year. And just see what would happen.
And here I am a year later. The facts are that I went from, if I was lucky, one person reading a post to now having four people reading a post. Previously, I had 60 followers after three years of off and on blogging, to now having 221 followers. I have had seven comments shared over this year, and a bunch of likes. And I also know in the world of online traffic, that this isn’t a blip on anyone’s radar. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate more than anything that I am not yelling into a void. That people take the time to stop by, like something, does make me feel good, and not so alone.
When I picked up blogging again, I did want to better myself as a writer, even though I wasn’t exactly sure the type of writer I wanted to be. And honestly, I’m still not sure. But I did know that if I wanted to get better at anything, I had to practice. I had to put in the time, and start doing the work. That meant committing to something, and doing it on days that I didn’t want to do it. And reading over things that I wrote, and admitting that it sucked and I could do better. And slowly, I started to enjoy the work, and look forward to the work.
So, to the four of you that will see this today, thanks again for stopping by. I have, hopefully, another year of work ahead of me. Let’s see what happens.
(The short story “Unread Messages” by Sally Rooney, was featured in the July 12th & 19th, 2021 issue of The New Yorker.)
When it comes to authors, I am the worst type of fan. I have been following Sally Rooney ever since The New York ran a piece on her, right before Rooney’s second novel, Normal People, was published. I watched Normal People on HULU, but I have ever read a word of her fiction. I collect books, but sometimes never read them. Which I guess does beg the question, can you be a fan of a writer yet never read their writing?
That changed this week, as I read Rooney’s short story, “Unread Messages” in this week’s issue of The New Yorker. I was actually excited when I saw her name in the table of contents, because I can now read this author.
It is a story about Eileen and Simon, and their lives together and not together. As what I was expecting from Rooney, the characters are in their late twenties and early thirties, moving from early to middle adulthood. The story was in two sections, relatively. The first was a meet up for coffee between Simon and Eileen at lunch, which they flirt, and Simon asks her for advice on how to deal with a friends odd platonic/romantic entanglement. Then the story shifts back in time, giving the background on the characters, and proceeds to move forward. I feel the first section takes place after the end of the story. It’s not high drama, but it is the story of love and wanting to be loved.
What I took away most was Rooney’s skill at writing. The words and sentences are short, succinct, and to the point. Nothing feels superfluous, or indiscriminate in the construction of the sentences. This is writing that moves ahead, but doesn’t feel rushed, in the sense that, I felt like I was getting exactly what I needed to know. Which is strange that a character, that plays a supporting role to Eileen, is mentioned as having been admitted to a psychiatric hospital, and then is never brought up again. I found this decision odd and puzzled why it was made? To bring Eileen and Simon closer, but even that felt too simple. And that is how I would describe the story; simple. As in the end, the central question of this story is, “Are they, or aren’t they going to get together?”
But it was a beautiful, simple story, written by an author that is very confident in her ability to write.
One of the many benefits of sending the kid to a Summer Day Camp was that I was going to have an opportunity to write. Unobstructed writing was the plan. And I was a little nervous heading into the two week stretch; would I actually follow through?
Follow through has always been a problem for me. And procrastination. I have had many opportunities in my life to get ahead on creative work, and for one reason or another, I found a way to watch tv, or clean, or snack, or find some errand that I HAD to accomplish first before I could start writing.
I remember once when I was in junior high, and I was semi-sick, and my dad let me stay home from school. I promised him that if I was home, I would practice my trumpet, as I was in band, all day. The old man agreed, and I stayed home, and watched tv. Didn’t touch the trumpet once. When my dad came home from work, and asked me about the trumpet, I was honest and told him I didn’t practice. He didn’t get mad at me, he just said he was very disappointed that I wasted the day, and didn’t keep my promise.
That moment still sticks with me. Whenever I have the chance to work creatively, and I decided that I should, instead, watch my favorite episodes of Mad Men, that memory pops back into my head.
I am testing my follow through this week. To see if I am really serious about this writing thing.
(The short story “Offside Constantly” by Camille Bordas, was featured in the June 28th, 2021 issue of The New Yorker.)
I have had a soft spot for stories that deal with grief, because I am still dealing with the grief of my mother’s passing. This affection explains why I was such an avid supporter of “WandaVision,” and still list it as one of the best TV shows of 2021, as it was a story about how even the best people can fall victim to, be consumed by, and ultimately, deny that they are in mourning. That once you start down that path, it is very difficult to get out of it. “Offside Constantly” is another story of a protagonist dealing with the effects of grief, and how to deal with those emotions.
From the start, teenager Johanna is talking about death, or how people die. Her brother has recently passed, and she is dealing with a probable case of narcolepsy, but it cannot be confirmed because her mother won’t allow a spinal tap. We learn about Johanna’s obsession of getting her brother’s obituary listed in a magazine, and her attempts at helping another girl at school deal with her mental issues. Her mother comes across as caring, and her father is distant, but both seems to be handling their grief away from Johanna’s observations. When the climax of the story arrives, Johanna’s actions have changed though she explains that she hasn’t changed her mind.
What I read was smartly written, but I would also categorize it as a “something-yet-nothing happens” story. Yes, clearly things happen; a plot was set forth, a climax occurred, and there was a resolution, but it felt like nothing happened. I think this was caused by the narration of Johanna, who never seemed too concerned for anything, other than a moment when her parents showed some affection towards each other, which upsets her, as she sees it as they are returning to “normal.” I understand that teenagers can be angsty and attempt to portray themselves as disinterred in everything, but this teenager talked like she was over 30, which left me feeling that the character lack authenticity. Grief can manifest in numerous different ways for each person. There isn’t one way to mourn, and we should allow people the breath of space to discover, or learn, what their new normal life will be as loss now accompanying them. I apricate that “Offside Constantly” took the time to look at the loss of a sibling, but I never could understand why Johanna wanted to share this with me, as I don’t think the story decided if her situation was dire, and needed to be corrected.