Category: Uncategorized

  • Personal Day

    It’s my last day of vacation. I’m just going to fart the day away…

  • ODDS and ENDS: The Rain, Making Breakfast, Coffee, and Tottenham

    (Don’t go breakin’ my heart…)

    I don’t know how things are where you live, but up here in New York, I think we are in the sixth weekend where it rains, especially on Saturdays. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it’s nice to have a cold rain Saturday in Fall, where you can curl up on the couch, read a book, watch a movie, take a nap – you know, do cozy stuff. After six weeks of rainy weekends, I would like to see the sun and go outside and not get wet. In the Summer, sometimes we get in a pattern of five days of sun, then one rainy day, followed five or six days of sun, and the cycle repeats. But rain every weekend feels a bit like a punishment. “Tough week? Working for the weekend?” “Tough shit! You’re Stuck Inside!” On the spectrum of disappointments, six weeks of rainy weekends isn’t that bad. Yet I do wonder if this is some kind of record.

    I know that I am not like most people, and I do have time in the morning. When I was working an office job, mornings were nothing but a rush, and not very pleasant. So now, with the extra time, I have started to try and treat the mornings as a calm start to the day, which includes a breakfast. Not a fruit bar, or frozen waffle, but a meal. Though it is a small meal, it is still a meal. I have noticed a few things after having done this for a month now. First, mornings are calmer for all of us now. Not as frantic, though some mornings getting the kid out the door can be a challenge. Second, with eating breakfast, I find that I don’t snack throughout the day. No mindless eating while working on things. The third thing I noticed about myself is that I feel like I have accomplished something. A while ago, I read that you should make your bed every morning because it will make you feel that you have order at the start of your day, and also that you have accomplished at least one task in your day. Yeah… I never felt like that when I made my bed. But, I do have that feeling after having eaten and fed my family. Just saying…

    I need another cup of coffee.

    Tottenham plays on Monday, which is annoying.

  • Edgy

    I guess it was this weekend, that I started to notice that I was getting edgy. The wife refers to it as “being feisty” because I find reasons to argue over little things. It’s not like they are real arguments, more like just contradictory comments – never ending comments. Either way, it gets on people’s nerves.

    And it first, I don’t know why everything is rubbing me the wrong way. I have a twitch in my eye and jaw, FYI. Then I look at the calendar and see that on Saturday it’s been five years since my mom’s passing.

    Now it makes sense.

    After my mom passed, I remember reading an essay about how the author was dealing with their grief, and how the week of their parent’s passing, they would find themselves angry, and lashing out. They knew why they were doing it, and even though they tried to stop it, they couldn’t.

    I feel like that. I feel I should know better, and not do it, but also, doing it feels correct.

    What I was surprised by was forgetting, or a better phrase to use would be, not remembering that my mom’s passing was coming. A little of it was avoiding the anniversary. Another bit was that I actually forgot. I went into October thinking about Fall, leaves, gourds, apple picking, and Halloween. Like you should. This was the first year where October didn’t mean “mom’s death.”

    But sub-consciously, I did know. Maybe it wasn’t at the forefront of my mind, but it was rattling around back there. It was always be there, and that’s okay.

  • ODDS and ENDS: Comfort over Style, a Willie Nelson Halloween, and ???

    (Our Brand means Quality…)

    I’m in my mid-forties, and I have never been a stylish person. In fact, my “style” has barely evolved beyond what I wore in high school: jeans, tee-shirt, over shirt, All-Stars. When I was working in an office, I held on to a sort of American/Ivy style of khakis, button-down, plaid tie, sports coat, and (depending on my mood) All-Stars. Since my move to stay-at-home-dad I have cannibalized my clothing a put on a mismatch of casual and casual work clothing. What that means is one day could be a tee-shirt, while the next is a button-down, and on another I might put on a sports coat. But I noticed something today, and it’s that I have started putting on running shoes as my go-to footwear now. Also, I have started lounging around the apartment in workout clothes – you know, with elastic waist bands. I think I might be slowly de-evolving into comfy clothes most of the time.

    Halloween is coming and we are all looking to figure out what our costume will be this year. My daughter has a very specific idea that she is looking to execute, and I will not be the one to ruin her surprise. That leaves the wife, me and the dog. We really wanted to do a family theme. A long time ago, the kid went as Dee Snider from Twisted Sister, and we were her roadies. We all loved it, but we haven’t worked together on a united costume since. Last year, I pushed very hard for us to be the Beastie Boys from the “Intergalactic” video, but I got no takers. This year, I think we should go as Willie Nelson, but in different periods of his career. Like, the wife would do young Willie, and I would be old Willie, and the dog would be middle of the career Willie. I don’t know if you know this, but having grown up in Texas, we are required to dress up as Willie for at least one Halloween.

    Ice Cream solves all problems. Seriously, try it.

  • GOURDS!

    I bought gourds this morning at Trader Joe’s. You know, the Fall/Autumn/Halloween gourds that come out on October 1st, and are sold through Thanksgiving. Well, it was two tiny pumpkins and a gourd to be exact, but as I get deeper into the season, I will buy more of these. I wouldn’t call it a weakness, but it is the one seasonal decoration that I indulge.

    Soon, most likely this weekend, we’ll go to our storage space and get the box of Halloween and Thanksgiving decorations to put up. Most of what is in there are silly, kid-like things to put up. Also in that box, there is a collection of dollar store small glittery pumpkins. Soon our kitchen table will be a collection of both real and fake gourds. You know, how the Pilgrims intended.

    When the kid was little, two or three, she would paint the white pumpkins to add to the decorations. I don’t think she does that anymore. And I start to wonder how long we’ll keep decorating the apartment with these cartoonish and child-like decorations?

    My parents kept reusing all the old holiday decorations until I went away to college. With me, the final child was out of the house, so my mom decided that it was time to have more grown up decorations for all the holidays. Gone were the doe-eyed cats and bats, to be replaced with wreaths of fake orange leaves and gourds. (But her gourds were plastic and ceramic.) Christmas even got more mature with an all-white lights on an all-white tree. You get the idea…

    I have a feeling we’ll do the same thing when our kid heads out of here, to college or where ever.

    But I like my gourds.