That’s not to say that I don’t like this song. “Nicotine & Gravy” is awesome as is the everything on Midnite Vultures. What get stuck in my head from “Nicotine & Gravy” is the part where Beck sings, “I don’t wanna die tonight.” See that; that’s the part that gets stuck in my head on a loop.
Category: Art
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Return of the Sketchbook
If there was one thing in life that I could fix, it would be to make it easier to hold on to good habits. I am great at creating and sustaining bad habits; I’m master at that. But good habits? Hell no. Even if I do follow the three-month rule, you know, if do anything for three months then it will become a habit; Even if I do that, for something that is good for me, if I take one day off, I will never return to that good habit.
Case in point, and it’s not the gym, I used to be very good at drawing something just about every day in my sketchbook. A while ago, I remember reading a profile on the painter Chris Ofili, and in it Ofili described his daily routine which was that when he woke up in the morning, he would do a sketch. I thought that was a pretty good idea, and from my perspective, drawing a sketch everyday means that you are creative and accomplishing something, every day. So, I tried to keep that up.
And sadly, I couldn’t. I go through periods where I’m on top of it. Especially with the kid, she has several sketchbooks, and it’s an activity that we can do together. But at some point, something comes up and the habit gets broken all over again. The current sketchbook that I have was started back in 2022. I’ve almost filled it up, but still, you know – there really isn’t an excuse for three years.
So, today, I decided to get back on that horse. No more of looking at my sketchbook on my desk, gather dust. Nope. It’s time for me to get some more creativity flowing, even if the drawing is basic and simple. Getting started and creating the habit is the point, regardless of what the sketch looks like.
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Summer Summer Summer
My kid has started counting down the days until Summer vacation. (She has 17 days left.) Schools about to be out forever, and the sweaters and coats are being packed away for another season. She is talking about swimming and vacations, and going to the beach all the time now. The start of Summer is so close, yet still far away for her, but the idea of Summer seems infinite – long hot days, and then cool evenings sitting on the couch in air conditioning.
I try not plan too much of her Summer. We’ll do some trips to museums, and we’ll hit up the local community pool. The kid has told me that she wants to work on her soccer skills, and I think I can convince her to go hiking. What I would really like to do is put her to work on a few home improvement projects around here. I would like to paint the living room, and I think I could make that a life lesson that she needs to learn.
You know, I enjoyed my time as a kid, and to be honest, if I had a choice of going back and being a kid again, I would not take it. I like being an adult. BUT! If there is one feeling I could relive one more time, it would be that feeling on the last day of school, when the bell rings for the final time, and you are free to go forth on your Summer vacation. That felling of weight being lifted, of freedom, excitement, possibility… That! If I could just grasp that feeling once more.
I do get the next best thing, which is seeing my daughter live it.
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Short Story Review: “Nocturnal Creatures” by Saïd Sayrafiezadeh
(The short story “Nocturnal Creatures” by Saïd Sayrafiezadeh appeared in the May 5 th, 2025 issue of The New Yorker.)
Illustration by Anuj Shrestha
I like this story a lot, so I’m not gun’na fart around with some cute opening here. “Nocturnal Creatures” by Saïd Sayrafiezadeh is a very good story and you should read it.
Overly Simplified Synopsis: A exterminator meets a single mother and her son while on the job, and they all become involved.
To start with, Saïd Sayrafiezadeh crafts this story very well. Every time I have read this story, I keep coming to a better appreciation of how all the pieces of this story are laid out, how they interlock and interact. For example, the first section of this story establishes the character of the exterminator, how he views himself and his job. Then going into the next part, when he meets the mother, we are shown the ways she tries to take care of herself and her son which leads us to understand, from the previous section, why the exterminator would identify with her. It’s a little cheesy to say this, but Sayrafiezadeh does an excellent job of “showing” us who these characters are, and not “telling” us. (And somewhere in the world, a creating writing professor just got his wings!) But seriously, each section builds on the previous, creating a momentum in the story with their actions. The narrative never gets mired down in explanations, because Sayrafiezadeh provides a clear understanding of these characters motivations by what they are doing.
And these are characters that have lived, and maybe they haven’t had the best breaks in life, but they aren’t broken either. There is an optimism to them, but also a melancholy. Are they repeating past mistakes, or trying to make amends for their past? I was fascinated with how the exterminator never said he cared about the mother and her son, but his actions were that of a guy who wants to take care of them. The fact that he gave up his day sleeping time to be with them, wasn’t lost on me. And this was a mother who hadn’t given up on her ambitions, but she knew she had responsibilities which she did her best to uphold. I felt I knew these people, and wanted them to succeed, to carve out the happiness they deserved. But there felt like a little dark cloud hung over their lives, keeping the story grounded in realism, because life’s not always fair, no matter how good intentions attempt to be.
I wanted it to work out. I wanted them to be happy, but there isn’t a clear, concrete answer to what happens next, and that’s okay. I’m good with the decision that Sayrafiezadeh made to end it the way he did. Maybe it’s a bit of a ploy – yet I would argue that over the course of the story, we have been shown how these characters continually make choices to be together. So why would that change at the end of the story when they reach the crux of their situation?
