Blog

  • Why I Still Blog, And Thanks Everyone

    I do feel that from time to time, I have to remind myself what it is that I am doing here. Yelling into the void, used to be what came to mind when I would post a blog. Back in July 2020, when I made a choice to focus and work harder on my writing, this blog was a great place to test out those muscles. The dark void faded away, and I started to see that creative endeavors, no matter how large or small, do serve a purpose, sometimes to an affect that doesn’t seem relevant for some time. After having kept this up for nine months, the one thing I can so for certain is that I can now keep my personal deadlines and goals when it comes to writing.

    The other thing I can say is that I now have over 200 followers! Back in July 2020, I had around 60, so gaining 140 followers in nine months, I take as a compliment. I am also sure the majority of these new followers are not Russian bots. Being that this is a blog which, subject wise, is all over the place, and doesn’t seem to be much more than I guy sharing opinions and trying to learn how to write better, I would like to say thank you for taking the time to read.

    Spasiba!

  • Covid Weight Gain

    I put on some weight over the pandemic. Let’s say it’s close to twenty pounds. And when I say that it’s close to twenty pounds, I mean that it is over twenty pounds. I have put on over twenty pounds. In fact, I just weighed myself, and it’s 21.3 pounds. Mind you, I was a little pudgy around my middle before the pandemic, but that was due to driving everywhere in California, and not walking like I used to do in New York, But, before California, I had added a little weight after the kid was born, that I never took off. So, I’m thick in the middle. I’m a thick in the middle, middle aged guy.

    And I want to do something about it.

    Part of it is that I have been eating my feelings. Especially eating my feelings late at night when I watch MST3k on Pluto TV. (That’s my happy place.) I used to walk everywhere in pre-pandemic New York, like close to 9,000 steps a day without trying. I just looked at my phone’s pedometer, and looks like I walk about 4,000 steps a day. So, not doing too well there, even for the low hanging fruit. To be successful, I know that I have to change my lazy grazing life style, along with doing some exercise, and just moving more.

    But the issue is just getting started. Getting off my ass and beginning seems like a million miles away. I know all the benefits that will come if I just start working out a little, and I can even go the super vein route and say that I want to look good when I go to the beach this Summer. (Since I will be vaccinated by the start of May, I think I should go on vacation.) And not to mention that I should do things to stay alive for as long as possible, family and kid in all…

    But…

    But… The pandemic sure has made me physically lazy.

    No.

    Actually, the pandemic gave me to opportunity to be lazy, and I took full advantage of it.

  • Thoughts on the Philip Roth Biography

    I don’t know if you have heard, but there is a new biography on Philip Roth called, “Philip Roth: The Biography” by Blake Bailey. It’s not the most original title, but not unlike a well worn club, it gets the job done. That having been said, I will read Bailey’s Roth biography, and I will also read his biography on John Cheever as well.

    Over the past couple of weeks, as this biography was about to be released to the public, the W. W. Norton & Company marketing department went into overdrive promoting this book, as they should. There was an article in The New York Times, one in The New Yorker by David Remnick no less, and even one on CBS Saturday Morning. I am sure there were more out there, but I stopped with three. They all did their job; made me want to get the biography, and to reread Roth’s work.

    I did notice that all three of these stories on the Roth biography had the same through-line; Roth didn’t want a biography written about him. In one form or another, each piece detailed Roth’s troubled relationship with past biographers, and his tendency to lash out, through unpublished books, defending his reputation after he felt attacked. And, that somehow, either through Roth reaching the end of his life, or by Blake Bailey’s ability to mine the information out of Roth, this biography came to be. And all of that might be completely true. Or a narrative created by the marketing department to increase sales.

    But, then I had this wacky thought that, what if this was Roth’s plan all along? Such as, he denied that most of his work was auto-biographical, but it turns out it was auto-biographical. Roth sure didn’t like the book his ex-wife wrote about him, which painted him as a misogynist. This led Roth to write one of the unpublished manuscripts where he attacked and attacked her, which in the end, sort of confirmed his ex-wife’s book. So, what if Roth created a narrative of “not wanting” a biography, while at the same time leading the biographer to “water?” Wouldn’t that give Roth the final say?

    I will add this; Philip Roth did write a memoir (Patrimony: A True Story) so if he wanted to tell his own story, he could have. In fact, he tried twice, but was persuaded, and it sounds correctly, not to publish. Also, choosing a biographer for your life while you are still alive, does come off as sounding subjective, especially after you had already fired one biographer. Finally, Roth was the best storyteller in the room, so why would he let someone else tell his most important story?

    Just a thought. I mean, I will still buy the book.

  • I Got Vaccinated, and I Waited

    I got my first vaccine today. In three weeks, I will get my second vaccine. And then I guess we start living in a post Covid-19 world.

    That’s all good. And I do want to focus on the fact that we are getting close to living in a world where you can go places and see people. That this vaccine will be my first step in moving towards this world.

    I was nervous going to get the vaccine this morning. Anxious, nervous, feeling off, and butterflies in the stomach; all of that was happening to me as I headed out to The Bronx. Everyone is handling getting their vaccine in their own way. I have friends who dressed up for it, others who started to cry when they got it, and still others who took pictures of the whole process, including the nurse who gave the shot. I had brought my journal, as I wanted to write about it, document what I was thinking and how it felt. I even thought about taking pictures.

    And then I got to the hospital and I just wanted to experience it. Just be. Let it happen, and not think. I filled out my paperwork, and sat in the waiting room. My nurse was a real nice guy, and took me back to the room from my shot. He was an easy going person, and the shot was painless, and he handed me a button showing that I was vaccinated, though I don’t think I should wear it until I get the second shot. You know you have to wait 15 minutes, and I set a timer on my phone, and waited. I waited, and I thought how my salvation was being confirmed by waiting. Not doing, just sitting.

  • Staying in Remote Learning

    Spring Break is over for the kid, and we are back at it with remote school. When last I wrote about school, it was about the decision that the wife and I have to make about whether we would send our daughter to the school, or if we would continue remote learning. After kicking the idea around for a week, we decided that it would be best for our daughter to stay in her remote class. This is the best choice out of nothing but bad options.

    The main driving force in our decision was consistency. By switching over to blended learning, it would mean that the kid would get two new teachers; one in the classroom, and one that is remote, as this would be an every other day system. Also, NYC schools still have a policy implemented that shuts down the school if two people have positive test results. At any point, the kid could get moved to remote learning until the Department of Education gives an all clear to return. In some cases, that may take up to a week to reopen. Though I just saw on my phone that the Mayor is revising this policy.

    By staying with the remote learning, we will have a consistent teacher, who is the school’s actual kindergarten teacher, and we know, as she has been at the school for over ten years, that she is teaching the kids in the system to get them ready for first grade in that school. This, we feel, gives the kid the best foundation for continuing to succeed at this school. And it is a school that we really like, and tests academically well, so we plan on staying there.

    But, this decision means that our daughter will go this entire school year without having any kid interaction in the school, which is awful. There is all the social interaction with being around kids, learning to communicate, and make friends, and share, and all of that fun wonderful stuff. And also, learning to separate from us and be her own person.

    Like I said, there was no clear right choice. It was a decision that we hope is right, and only time will tell.