Blog

  • After Effects of a Vacation

    I read an article yesterday that most people are happier leading up to their vacation, than actually on their vacation. I took a second to think about that, and I knew that this was true. Yes, the best part of a vacation is counting down the days. Once you get where you are going, then everything goes sideways.

    This year, we talked to kid about this. How, the one of the best parts of being on vacation is when things do go wrong, because that is when you make new discoveries. I know that isn’t 100% true, but I wanted to plant the idea in her head that when things go wrong, it becomes an opportunity to try new and different things. I think it sort of worked. There wasn’t too much complaining, but the trade-off was that she wanted to spend a large amount of time on the family iPad.

    Oh well…

    But we did experience something new with the kid this year when we came home from vacation; she was a little depressed. The kid is seven now, and not little anymore, both physically and emotionally. We all have known that feeling of coming home from a vacation; if you had a good time, then there is that feeling of letdown; a little sadness of having to come home and go back to the old routine. That’s normal.

    This year was the first time that the kid experienced that. And she didn’t know what to do with these feelings. She was sad, sullen, and even had a little bit of a breakdown, and cried in her room for a bit. The wife and I talked, and made sure that we were on the same page on how to deal with this. The most important thing was not to make her feel ashamed for feeling sad. We let her tell us in her own way what was wrong, and let her just experience feeling bad. Then when she calmed down, we started talking about the fun we had, the memories we created, and what we should do with the rest of our summer.

    I know we can’t stop her from feeling bad, or sad, or experiencing emotions that are hard to put your finger on. But we can help her understand that having strong feelings is normal, and can be a good thing. And that there are constructive ways of dealing with them.

  • Reforming the Writing Habit

    July was a busy month with vacations, and the kid did some traveling with friends, and I had a huge home improvement project to finish. And I started watching Vikings, which I am finding really entertaining.

    Something had to give, and that was writing. After two years of writing nearly every day, I decided I should take a break. There was a nagging thought in the back of my head that if I took a break then in a roundabout way, I was admitting that writing isn’t that important to me.

    Maybe…

    The other thought I had was that everyone needs time away, a respite, time off. I have been working at all of this, blogging every weekday, working on stories and submitting them to magazines, and I especially have been journaling constantly. I have put down close to 500,000 words from July 2020 to July 2022.

    But, I got out of the habit of writing every day. Just the mechanical act of sitting down, either with the computer or a journal, and putting down thoughts and ideas. If I felt like doing it or not, I did it. Out of everything I had tried over these past two years, I think that was the achievement I was most proud of; I had a good habit of writing each day.

    With the time off, I have to restart this habit all over again. Maybe I’ll fall right back into it. Maybe I have to work at it again. Maybe none of this really is a big deal.

    Maybe.

    Now, I just got to start going to the gym again.

  • I’m on a Hiatus

    July has been a busy month for me. I’ve been traveling, completing home improvement projects, and ring Summer tour guide for my kid.

    I guess what I am saying is that I’m taking a hiatus in the month of July. I’m not shutting down the blog, or stopping writing. I know that my out put is going to be infrequent until the start of August.

    So, I’m taking the pressure off my shoulders as I uphold my commitments and promises I made to my family, and especially my daughter.

    I’ll be back in about a week, and I’ll talk to the four of you loyal readers then.

  • Life with My Dog

    We have a little dog that is one tough coward. This dog is great with people and kids, and I have often made the joke that if I got mugged while walking her, the dog would roll over for the mugger. BUT, what makes the dog maddening is that she want to fight and kill any dog we encounter on the street. So, she tried to be a tough little dog.

    And then the rain comes, and she turns into the biggest little chicken. I know many dog are scared of thunder and fireworks, and our furry one is the same. Right now, thunderstorms are rolling through, and she is curled up with me, shivering, waiting for the weather to pass.

    I am taking full advantage of my scared dog. Normally, she is following my wife around the apartment because I guess the dog thinks she’s the alpha around here; Not that the dog is wrong. This means I don’t get a whole lot of snuggle time with the dog.

    Not that I am demanding that the dog spends her time with me. I am a cat person, so I feel like an animal and me should be more like roommates than family members. You know, I respect your space, your respect mine. But now and then, I would like the dog to curl up on my lap while I read. Not a big ask, but I feel it is manageable.

    The one thing I will say (as a person, a person in a relationship, and a person in a family) I don’t think I like the idea of living without an animal. There is something reassuring having a pet in the home, and taking her on vacations, and just another life at the end of the bed.

  • ODDS and ENDS: New Schedule, Rewriting, and August 6th

    (I do less before 9am, than most people do all day.)

    The kid is out of school for summer which means that stay-at-home-dad’s school year schedule has been thrown out the window. I know it isn’t my job to “entertain” the kid every moment of the day, but it does mean that I am her go to person for questions, and just about everything else. The quandary I find myself in is when do I write? I was knocking out blogs in the morning, but as of this week, the time is hard to find. I might have to write at night and publish in the morning. Or, whatever. I’ll figure out the new schedule.

     While I was on vacation, I didn’t do much writing, though I did spend a bit of time thinking about it. What I came up with is that I have to rewrite a story. And it’s a story that I have rewritten three times already. And it’s a story that I have submitted to four different lit journals. Not that it matters, as the chance of it getting published, even if it is rewritten, are slim at best. I just can’t stop tinkering with it. On one hand, I want to get it right, and on the other hand, I wonder if I keep messing with it as a form of procrastination?

    Premiere League starts up on August 6th. Well, that’s when Tottenham’s first match is.