Author: Matthew Groff

  • Halfway Through Summer

    I know for some of you out there, you are in the final stretch of Summer, and I have even seen some of my friends back in Texas talk about their kids starting school in a week or two. But for us up here, we are at the half way point; only five weeks and a handful of days left before school starts up again.

    I’m not going to get into all the craziness of schools opening up, as I feel I will be writing about that the closer we get to that date.

    What I was struck by was how fast it is going, which is good, and that I need to start thinking about the planning that comes with school on the horizon. School supplies and clothes shopping, and I think we need to get a winter coat for the kid this year.

    Today, the kid and I are going to do what my mother did for me when I was little and on summer vacation, which is go to the library and check out books. This will be the kid’s first visit to our local library, and I hope there is a way for her to get her own library card. Going to the library was always something fun I remember doing with my parents, and I hope I can pass that love of being around books to the kid.

    Five weeks to go, and lets’ see what fun we can have.

  • If Art is Made And No One Sees It, Is It Art?

    Today, I took the kid over to the Museum of Modern Art. This was our second time there, and I let her lead the way. Explore what she wanted, ask whatever questions, and just let her discover what she liked.

    What really set her on fire today was the Henri Matisse Cut-Outs. At first, she just liked the colors and the shapes, but when I read the description of the work provided by the museum, she quickly made the connection that she too cuts out construction paper and makes pictures! She decided that she needed to sketch these cut-outs so she could try it at home.

    It was pretty busy today, so we found a bench in the adjacent gallery so she could draw in her sketchpad. The gallery we were in was displaying films and photographs of artists who were documenting their different cities that they lived in during the late 60’s and early 70’s. This I found interesting and inspiring as it seemed like something I should be doing, and could be doing as well. (Maybe I am doing it?) But I came to a question; Were they documenting for themselves or for an audience?

    You can make all of these things, follow these creative endeavors, but at the end of the day, do you need someone to share it with? Does expression need to have an audience to be expressed to? My uncle, who was an artist, would have said no, that art doesn’t need a witness. He would say art is a process, and not explicitly a product.

    Maybe he was right. Maybe the work is the thing.

  • It’s Not Happening Today

    I keep trying to write, but I let other things get in the way.

    I mean, I’m writing now, but it’s not enough time to complete a thought.

    I had the expectation that it would be easier in Summer.

    I’m finding the opposite to be true.

  • Who Visits Gettysburg, and Why?

    This weekend, we went down to VA to pick up our kid who had been visiting friends for a week. The drive back to NYC would take us through the hellscape that is the I-95 corridor from DC to NYC. It can take anywhere from 5to 8 hours just to get home. So, we thought we’d go a new route; Virginia to Maryland, to Pennsylvania, to New Jersey and then NYC. Waze said it would take seven hours, which was then same amount of time if we took the direct I-95 path.

    Anyway, the halfway point was sort of close to Gettysburg. As I am a pretty huge Civil War buff, and a big Lincoln Fan, we decided that a stop at the National Military Park and Battlefield would be a good idea.

    But this isn’t going to be about the battlefield or the park. This is about the people who come and visit Gettysburg, and why.

    When I encountered people, it was at the Visitor Center, which had a good introduction to the park, and the bathrooms. The first observation I made was that the people visiting are overwhelmingly white, myself included. The other thing I noticed was a lot of former and current military, and I knew this by the veteran caps and t-shirts that they were wearing. And then there were lots of conservative people, and I mean lots of them. I can say this with confidence due to the t-shirts, and bumper stickers that said, “Don’t Tread on Me,” “Blue Lives Matter,” and “Trump.”  And also, lots of guys sporting AR-15 buttons and pins. That’s not to say that there weren’t other people out there, because there were. I would describe this group as people who weren’t in other two groups, but still white.

    The people I did talk to were all nice, and very friendly. We brought the dog with us, and throw in a kid, and I came across as pretty non-threating. What I got from people is that they wanted to see Gettysburg to honor and respect the history. Also, the thought that “things were simpler then,” came up often, which I found fascinating as a civil war seems to me to be a very complicated thing.

    For me, I’m just happy that Americans want to experience our history. The reasoning behind it is never the same for each person, and that’s okay. Some are there for the fighting and the war, others are there to see where our new birth of freedom began.

  • The Kid’s First Time Being Homesick

    Our daughter has been visiting friends for the past few days. She has been looking forward to this trip for months! She was getting to travel, be in a house that had a pool, hang out with other kids all day, and have a summer adventure.

    When we dropped off the kid, she couldn’t have given two craps that we were leaving. She was excited and laughing, and wanted to be away from us. There was a little sting with her being so blasé with our exit, but on a more important level, I was happy that she wasn’t having any separation issues. We FaceTimed each night, and she was bubbling over telling us all about the fun she was having, but the call always ended with her telling us that she loved us and missed us.

    Last night on our call, the kid was talking all about the fun they had, and then she got quite, and started to silently sob little tears. Oh, our hearts just broke. “I want to see you, here,” she cried, “I miss you.” We tried to console her, letting her know that we would all be together soon, and how much we loved her.

    This is also normal. This is the longest we have all been apart, and it’s especially hard on her. I also feel very helpless as all can do is try and comfort her through a computer screen. When what we all want is a big long silly hug.

    I remember that feeling of being away from your parents and never really knowing when you will see them again. When I was her age, I remember being upset, and my aunt called my mother so I could talk to her on the phone. My Ma would calm me down and tell me that she loved me and that we would all be together again, very soon. And it would help. But that lonely missing feeling never really went away in me; it was in the back of my head making butterflies in my stomach.

    I do hope my little girl is having fun today, and not missing us too bad. Though I expect that the next hug I get from her will be pretty tight and a little long.