This weekend, I thought that we, as a family, we going to go hiking. Turns out that we went and played disc golf. I was a little surprised, as I feel like disc golf is my little hobby, so when the wife and kid want to go and do it with me, I am always taken aback. But I wasn’t going to say no either. The kid did put in one request with the disc golf; we had to get pancakes for lunch after golfing. I could live with that.
The place we decided to go to was Gunks Disc Golf, which is in Mystic Park, Gardiner, NY. It was a bit out on the country, as it was an hour and a half drive from the City. Most of the drive was on I-87, but soon we were off the interstate, and on two lane highways, and state routes. Trees are everywhere, with houses set back off the road, and I wonder what do these people do for a living out there?
And the wife and I play the game of wondering if we could get a place out in the country?
It’s a fun game as we are driving in the car, but as the conversation turns from wishful thinking to is this even possible for us, then reality starts to creep in. We are a one income family, who is in debt. And we can’t do anything until that debt is taken care of. That’s our reality.
A reality that was in the back of my head the rest of the day. Mystic Park in Gardiner, NY was a very pleasant and nice place. The course was fun, and it ran along Wakill River, which added to the sense that you were deep in nature. And I thought about how nice it would be to have a place near here, that we could spend the Summer, and weekends and holidays. To do that, I have to get a job. There is no way around it, if I want that, I have to bring money in.
I want to have a home, but to get that, something has to change, and change within me. I’m comfortable where I am, but I also feel like I don’t have the drive and ambition that I used to have. If I wanted something, I used to go and get it. I mean, I wanted to be in NYC and work in theatre, and I went and got it. Now, I question if I could follow through.
So, when I think about that house in the country, it’s not just a price tag, and expense that we’d have to pay for. It’s also means a change in my attitude and resolve. To achieve it, I have to change. And I can’t say for sure that I want to change.
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