Ma

Today would have been my mother’s 73^rd birthday.

Ma’s birthday and mine, which is a few days earlier, were always wrapped together in the spin of Winter and Christmas preparations. I’m trying to stay merry for the kid, but today is especially hard. It’s not that I feel on the verge of crying, or I can’t get out of bed, or make a joke. It’s just like a little cloud is over everything that happens to me.

I can’t stop being sad, and I don’t want to stop it either.