Following the Sun

On days that I get down on myself, I remember a tory a theatre professor of mine told.

It went along the lines of this…

Follow your dreams no matter what. That doesn’t mean your dreams will come true, but if you are open to all the places, experiences and people that you meet along the way, your life won’t be dull, and you’ll be in a much happier place.

I might be paraphrasing a little.

Mainly, I have followed that advice. Some days more than others, but lately I started to think that it was just stuff you would tell a class full of people that were about the graduate. It’s a positive statement, but it also gave the professor an out; most of you aren’t going to make it, but you’ll have fun.

And then I started getting older and seeing how other people also got older.

It’s the dream denied that is dangerous. It’s the people who told themselves that they couldn’t do what they wanted, but never gave up wanting it, that I am seeing more and more now. Yes, I saw a ton of bitter actors in New York, but in a sense, they hadn’t given up on themselves. They were just made at everyone else succeeding.

I now see people made at themselves. Disappointed in their choices in not trusting themselves and believing in themselves.

This observation of middle-aged people has scared me a little. I don’t think I have become that.

I still try, seeing where it goes.